Archive - October 2015

Elijah and Jesus’s Birthday

October 25, 2015

Life in Lape Haven: Write 31 Days - Elijah & Jesus's Birthday. How excited would Jesus be if we kept as our focus all year long?

One year, a few days before Christmas, all four members of our little family came down with a fabulous flu, effectively changing all of our holiday plans to “quarantined.”

Despite not feeling well, being stuck at home, and missing both sides of our families’ celebrations, our boys were still very excited for Christmas Day.

We had done a very simple “Advent-style” daily countdown to Christmas using a nativity scene window cling set. Each day one of the boys got to pick out which character or scene piece we put on the window, leaving Baby Jesus for Christmas Eve. Each night we talked about how Jesus came as a baby to save us all.

On December 24, they added Jesus to the manger, and then we did our traditional reading of the Christmas story. With our version, the boys get to use the pieces of my Fontanini nativity set to act out the story while we read it.

From there it was up to bed to say prayers and get our little guys tucked in for the night.

After Josiah’s usual prayer of, “Sank you for mommy an’ daddy an’ ‘Jah-jah’ (Elijah) an’ ‘Benny’ (Vinny), Hep me seep well. Amen,” it was Elijah’s turn.

Here was the best part: “Jesus, thank You that it’s Your birthday tomorrow. You’re probably going to be excited tomorrow.”

Brad and I quietly chuckled. We’re used to at least one of our children’s prayers having an amusing element.

But, as I’ve thought about it later, why shouldn’t Jesus be excited for Christmas? It was kind of a big day for Him and all of mankind.

Yes, I know, we don’t technically know the exact day that He was born, and it probably wasn’t even in December. However, I’m sure Jesus enjoys that we celebrate His birth and all that it meant, even if it’s not the very same, exact day. I mean, I don’t mind when people have a party for me when it’s not my birthday.

And yes, I know that much of the world has made Christmas into something where Jesus is completely forgotten. That’s like people having a party for your birthday without you, and yes, that’s rather rude and uncool.

However, there are still plenty of us remembering to invite the Guest of Honor, and not just inviting Him out of obligation so He can sit in the corner with the nativity set all awkward while we hang out with our friends and family and Santa Claus, singing “Jingle Bells” and sipping eggnog.

(A side note: In Lape Haven, we like the true history of St. Nicholas and his focus on blessing others, but the modern idea of Santa Claus is just a minor part of our holiday, kind of like Frosty, Rudolph, Scrooge, and Buddy the Elf).

No, I mean a Christmas where we truly strive to keep Jesus as the central focus of our festivities, honoring the sacrifice He came to make and reveling in the love that compelled Him to become flesh and dwell among us.

I think that would be exciting to Him.

And honestly, we don’t have to wait for Christmas; we shouldn’t wait for Christmas to make Him our priority, our focus, and our source of celebration.

As Christians, our holiday season should be a continuation of our everyday walk of giving Jesus His rightful place as Lord in our life, of praying for His will to be done, and of allowing the Holy Spirit to lead us, correct us, and make us more like Him. Christmas should be a celebration of all He’s done in and through us throughout the year.

Every night we could pray, like Elijah, and be thankful that Jesus came to us. We could tell Him, “Jesus, thank you that I can celebrate You again all day tomorrow. Jesus, You’re probably going to be excited tomorrow.”

“Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, because He has come to His people and redeemed them.” (Luke 1:68)

My Boys and the T-Shirts

October 24, 2015

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Life In Lape Haven: Write 31 Days - My Boys and the T-Shirts. Easy homemade super hero capes from old t-shirts

I love Pinterest. I really do. It is my homemaking Google. It is the best way to bookmark your finds and favorite pages from around the internet (recipes, articles, how-tos, inspirational quotes, anything) and the best way to find new things to bookmark.

I think my sister-in-law introduced me to this wonderful online world over 3 years ago, and suddenly I was making all kinds of things from scratch, such as bread, chocolate syrup, ice cream, taco seasoning, and 300 crockpot meals (Ok, I haven’t made THAT many, but I probably have almost that many pinned.)

Plus I had tons of great activities to do with my boys, including making our own play dough, sidewalk paint, and every kind of craft you can make with a child’s handprint on paper. (You KNOW it’s true!)

I soon knew at least 25 ways to prepare, reuse, wear, make, display, celebrate, share, show, decorate, or clean just about everything.

And, of course, Christmas and birthday parties would never be the same again.

Ok, actually, I never strive for a “Pinterest-perfect” anything – meal, event, home, or holiday. I don’t have time, money, or patience for that. I’m a bit more practical. But I do truly love the inspiration and creativity that I have found there. I have a little extra daring to try new things or figure out how to make something myself. It has helped me to look twice at common things and think, “What else can I do with this?”

So it was totally normal for me to get struck with inspiration one day while I was sorting out old clothes in my room and relegating worn t-shirts to the rag pile. I was about to be an “Awesome Mom.”

Snatching up my phone, I searched my Pinterest boards for the idea that I knew I had pinned, probably months ago.

There it was! Grabbing a couple of my old shirts, I headed downstairs.

“Hey, boys,” I called as I passed Elijah’s room where the two of them had been playing nicely for a change. “How would you like some super hero capes?”

They came thundering down the stairs behind me, curious and excited about whatever it was that Mommy was preparing to do.

Smoothing the t-shirts out on the table, I snipped off the sleeves and cut down both sides of the shirt. A quick trip with the scissors around the bottom of the neckband at the front of the shirt gave us one completed cape.

My boys were ecstatic!

Repeating the same steps on the other t-shirt, I held up two super hero capes to my eager little boys.

Josiah started calling out, “SuperMAAAAN! SuperMAAAAN!” before I even had the cape slipped over his head.

In probably less than 10 or 15 minutes from the time I had the idea, there were two super hero boys running in circles around the living room, with Josiah shouting, “Supermaaan, flying in the scare!” (He means “air.”)

I totally wish I had taken pictures of the project as we did it, but we were all a little too in to seeing if it would work. Since I didn’t, here are a couple of the many options on Pinterest for making some t-shirt capes for your own little super heroes.

Homemade Super Hero Cape – This one is similar to what I did.

DIY Super Hero Cape – This one opens the neckband to eliminate the choking hazard.

And of course, feel free to follow Life in Lape Haven on Pinterest. I’m always adding something because, you know, I love Pinterest.

Elijah and the Bully

October 23, 2015

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Life in Lape Haven: Write 31 Days - Elijah and the Bully

Sometime last month, Elijah got into the car after school and announced,

“I have to tell Daddy that he was wrong!”

Intrigued, I asked Elijah what he meant.

“He told me that bullies probably wouldn’t bother me, but he was wrong.”

That was not the reply I had expected from my kindergartener. I imagine he and Brad had talked about his class and bullies around the time Elijah was starting school (Perhaps Elijah had heard about bullies on TV and was worried?)

“Do you have a bully in your class,” I asked him.

“Uh-huh,” Elijah replied. “She isn’t very nice to people.”

So the bully was a girl. Hmmm.

Through a series of other questions, I learned about one little girl in his class who said mean (for a kindergartener) things to the other kids in the class. Apparently she had also gotten into trouble in class a lot and had even used a few bad words.

When we got to how she had bothered Elijah, he told me, “She came up behind me at recess and said, ‘I don’t like you.’”

At that point, I could have told Elijah how unkind that was or how mean she was, but I didn’t. I didn’t need to give Elijah more reason to feel hurt. Instead I felt it was important for Elijah to look at the situation a little differently.

I think I shocked him a little when I told him, “Well, she doesn’t have to like you. But do you play with her a lot? Does she know you?”

Elijah paused. “No.”

“So, how can she know if she doesn’t like you if she doesn’t know you?”

Since I was driving, I couldn’t see his reaction to this thought, but I could hear the smile in his voice when he said, “Yeah!”

Then I talked to him about how oftentimes, people who are unkind to others act that way because they aren’t happy themselves.

When he seemed a little confused, I gave him an example.

“When you are upset or in a bad mood, are you always nice to Josiah? Or do you treat him not very kindly if you’re grumpy?”

“I’m not very nice sometimes,” he admitted.

So he seemed to understand. We talked about how he could be kind to this girl, even if she was being mean, and how he could help his friends if she was mean to them. The last thing we did was pray for her, that she would learn to “be good” (his words) and that Elijah would be able to be nice to her.

When Elijah is older, I don’t know how much he’ll remember about the specifics of this school year. I personally remember several moments from my kindergarten experience while my hubby doesn’t remember any of his. If I tell him about a little girl who said that she didn’t like him, he’ll probably laugh it off, similarly to how my oldest nephew and I laugh at how, when he was three, he thought that calling me a “hunting deer” was a big insult.

However, whether Elijah remembers the incident or not, I’m hopeful that the habit of praying for those who are unkind to you and trying to understand and have compassion for them is something that sticks with him, something that becomes the automatic and the normal.

Jesus tells us to love our enemies (Matthew 5:44), and to bless those who curse us, pray for those who mistreat us. (Luke 6:28)

It usually isn’t the thing we want to do, whether we are 5 or 85. It usually isn’t easy. But it’s the right thing, the Godly thing to do.

Because through our obedience, our humility, and our efforts to love and forgive, God can change things, if only our heart for that other person.

Sometimes, though, he also changes the other person.

About a week or two after the initial incident with “the bully,” Elijah got into the car happily and ready to share about his day.

The first thing he told me was that this girl had done really well in class that day, “clipping up to purple,” which means she behaved so well that she was at the top of their classroom’s behavior monitoring chart and had earned a prize for the day.

Elijah said, “I told her that I was proud of her.”

Yes, my mommy heart melted. He was encouraging her to be good and letting her know that he had noticed.

I asked him how she responded to that, and he grinned at me.

“She smiled a little bit.”

I know that this little girl still has times of being mean or misbehaving in class because Elijah keeps me filled in on her progress, but he’s still watching out for her. We pray for her every so often, and his heart is kind toward her. He’s cheering her on, wanting good for her.

Whether or not this girl ever likes Elijah, she’ll definitely know that he cares about her.

This is part of my Write 31 Days series, “Out of the Mouth of Babes: 31 Quotes from My Children.” I’m posting every day in October, so if you’ve missed one and need to catch up, or if you really enjoyed a particular quote, you can find the entire series on my Write 31 Days page.

Another fun part of the Write 31 Days is that you can enter to win a $500 Shopping Spree from DaySpring.com!

DaySpring is celebrating all the amazing Write 31 Days READERS who are supporting the nearly 2,000 writers this month! Enter to win a $500 shopping spree by clicking this link and following the giveaway widget instructions. There will be a link at the end of each day’s post from October 15 through October 30.

I would love it if one of MY readers won!!! So, good luck and THANK YOU, THANK YOU for reading!

Elijah & the Roller Coaster: A Lesson in Facing Fear

October 22, 2015

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Elijah & the Roller Coaster - A Lesson in Facing Fear. Life in Lape Haven. Our son was both excited and scared to ride his first ever roller coaster, but through it we both learned a lesson in facing fears.

Last updated June 6, 2018

A few springs ago, Elijah began a mission to save money toward a family trip to Kings Island, one of the amusement parks here in Ohio. Two summers in a row, when Elijah was 2 and 3, we had received free tickets from hubby’s work, and it became Elijah’s favorite place in the world (we’ve never been to Disney). However, starting that year, the company outings changed to a different venue, so a trip to any amusement park suddenly became a more expensive venture for us.

Elijah was determined to go that year, though, so we struck a deal with him. In an effort to begin teaching him about making good financial choices and the importance of earning something you want, we promised him that if he could save enough for his ticket, we would go.

Through learning memory verses every week, doing various special chores, choosing to save his change instead of spend it, and designating the majority of his birthday money to savings, Elijah was able to put aside more than enough very quickly.

So our family planned a trip in late July, and Elijah counted down the days.

Part of our planning including visiting the Kings Island website to see what rides in Planet Snoopy, the Peanuts-themed kids’ area, that Elijah would be tall enough for then. I’m not sure who was more excited, him or us, when Brad and I realized that Elijah was able to ride everything in the kids’ area, including my favorite ride in the entire park. Several years ago, I had ridden the family inverted steel roller coaster (now based on Snoopy and the Red Baron) with my nephews, so I knew it was a fun, smooth coaster.

He was also tall enough to bump along on my very first coaster, a wooden contraption once named the Beastie. In keeping with the Peanuts branding, it is now called the Woodstock Express, but it is still as jostling as it ever was.

When the big day arrived, Elijah was both excited and nervous about his first real coaster ride. He decided to start his day slowly, enjoying familiar, tamer rides to build up his courage.

In previous years, he hadn’t been a big fan of even the mildest kiddie coaster, but being two years older, he tackled that one easily. He was ready to face a “real” coaster when it began raining. The downtime gave him a chance to vacillate and worry again while we enjoyed some yummy blue ice cream.

Had it been Josiah, he would have been in the front car of the biggest possible coaster as soon as he could. Elijah, however, has a bit of his mommy’s cautiousness to him, so I knew he would need a little coaxing to face something new and unknown. (I am very familiar with the feeling) We wouldn’t make Elijah ride the coaster, but we did encourage him to try it, even if he were a little nervous. Had he said he really didn’t want to, we would have gone on to something else.

After things dried out, he said he was ready, and Elijah and I found ourselves in line for the steel coaster, his little face betraying his anxiousness even though he was smiling.

He watched the other riders ahead of us, which I’m not sure helped, but the older girls talking about how fun the ride was did seem to give him the extra incentive to get strapped into the chair when our turn came.

I was proud of him. He was going to do it, even though he was a bit afraid.

Then he gripped my hand. And I knew.

He was scared, but he was trusting me. He knew I was right there with him. I had done this before, and now we were going to do this together.

He was okay for the initial “chugga-chugga-chugga” up the hill, but when the cars topped the incline and started to circle down the first hill, his handhold with me became a death-grip.

When he squeaked out, “Mommy!” I could tell he was NOT loving this quite as much as we’d hoped he would.

I squeezed his hand and told him that it was okay. I continued to reassure him through the remaining 60 seconds or so of the ride, and toward the end, he relaxed a tiny bit. However, he never let go of my hand.

Helping him down, I asked him what he thought, and he told me,

“I didn’t like it, but it was fun.”

My poor conflicted little guy. We’ve been working on “doing hard things” this past year, and this was definitely one of them.

Facing a fear is NEVER something we want to do. We don’t like it. It is, after all, scary. Most of the time, when we step outside of what we know, out of our comfort zone, we’re not overly thrilled to be doing so. It’s called a “comfort zone” for a reason – everything beyond those borders is uncomfortable.

However, it’s in the uncomfortable places where we grow, where we learn to be brave, where we learn to trust. And usually the reward for facing our fear is worth it. It might even be fun.

Life in Lape Haven: Write 31 Days - Elijah and the Roller Coaster

On the Woodstock Express – that face!

And we don’t have to face our hard things alone.

As I was describing how Elijah held my hand on the ride, I couldn’t help but see God in my spot and me in Elijah’s.

We all know that life can be a roller coaster, and who better for me to be holding onto than God?

There will be parts that scare me, that jostle me, that make me disoriented even. But I know Who is right there with me. I know that He knows where the ride is going, when it dips and when it rises. I can hear Him reassuring me the whole time.

Even in those seasons when it’s fun and exciting, I still hold tight to His hand because I need Him then, too, to share in the joy and to prepare me for whatever’s coming next.

I asked Elijah tonight what he would say about that ride now.

He told me again, “I didn’t like it. But next time I want to do it again.”

And I’ll be right there with him, holding his hand.

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Elijah and the Dream Job

October 21, 2015

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You know when you’re little, and someone asks you, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Most kids give a pretty standard answer, “A policeman,” or “A ballerina,” or “Superman,” and they stop there.

Not my child. And I bet, if you’ve been reading faithfully over these past 20 days or so of the Write 31 Days (or if you just read the title of today’s post), you can guess which one.

Oh, Elijah. My bright, imaginative, curious, optimistic dreamer.

Do you know what HIS standard answer is when he’s asked what he wants to be when he’s older?

“Everything.”

I’m serious.

He tells people that he wants to be “everything.” And this has been his standard answer for the past 2 years, at least.

Of course with that answer, he always expounds a bit, clarifying his “everything,” in case anyone wonders what that means exactly.

He says something like this, “I’m going to be everything. I’m going to be an astronaut, a firefighter, a preacher, a farmer, a zookeeper, and a daddy. I’m going to be everything.”

These are just some of the occupations that he says fairly often, but it is by no means a definitive list. He adds new ideas regularly to his “everything” dream job.

As a mom, I’m both amused and amazed.

He could totally be a lot of those things at once. In fact I know someone who has been a daddy, a preacher, a firefighter, and somewhat of a farmer, all at the same time, so it’s possible.

But to shepherd a heart that dreams so big is kind of intimidating. All I can do is pray that God leads his steps and gives Brad and me wisdom as we raise him. Pray that we lay the foundations solidly for his own relationship with God so he can follow God’s leading closely. Pray that we notice his talents, giftings, and strengths so we encourage them and pinpoint his weaknesses and challenges so we can help him overcome them. Pray that he does his best to reach his full potential and fulfill all the plans that God has for him, even if they differ from Elijah’s own ideas or ours.

Of course, that’s really the same thing I’d be doing if he only had one answer instead of every answer.

Parenting is all about doing your best, learning, and growing while you depend desperately on God for guidance and discernment, trusting that He can still work through all the mistakes you make, and simply trusting that His love for your child is even greater than your love for that child, that His plans for your child are “to give him a hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

Trusting can be hard. But God has never failed me, and I’m choosing to trust Him with my boys. After all, He’s the One Who gave them to us and trusted Brad and me with them in the first place. (It reminds me of Hannah with her Samuel in 1 Samuel 1:27 & 28)

So while I work to embrace the overwhelming ambitions of my little visionary, I am also excited at the possibilities.

Sure he most likely won’t be an astronaut AND a zookeeper. But with that kind of expectation, confidence, and determination, it’s kind of fun to imagine what he really could be, to wonder at what God has in store for him.

As much as I want him to be my little boy forever, I’m also excited to see the “everything” he’ll be when he grows up.

Remember to enter to win a $500 Shopping Spree from DaySpring.com!

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The Boy and the Backpack

October 20, 2015

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Life in Lape Haven: Write 31 Days - The Boy and the Backpack. It was a beautiful shot, but a more beautiful moment to capture the joy of true thankfulness.

Every August our church hosts a backpack giveaway event at the local elementary school, providing new backpacks and school supplies to hundreds of children in the area and giving all the families an afternoon of free fun with a street fair, bounce houses, games, face painting, and food.

This year was the first time my hubby and I were able to take part in the ministry since the past few years we have been out of town or on vacation the weekend of the event.

I was truly anticipating getting to be involved and even more so when I was asked to serve that day as the event photographer. Not only did I take that as a compliment (I am not a professional photographer at all), but that meant that I got to be everywhere throughout the afternoon and really see all that was taking place.

Had I been working a game or swirling the cotton candy onto a stick, it would have been wonderful, too, but I would have missed out on all the little moments of interactions between our church volunteers and the children they served. I might not have seen the adorable little smiles sticky with fresh cotton candy devoured before they had cleared the line. I’d have missed the opportunity to coax a snarl out of one of the little boys who’d gotten his face painted like a wolf. I wouldn’t have been near the backpack distribution tables to see the delight on a little girl’s face when she received the brand-new pink butterfly backpack that she wanted.

I also wouldn’t have been beside those same tables to witness one of the most genuine displays of gratitude of the day from a young boy whom I hope to always remember.

To receive their backpacks, families started out by visiting the registration table, and then they made their way around the school to come in through the playground gates to the distribution tables. There the children had their pick of at least a dozen patterns and styles of backpacks. Once they had their bags, they are invited to enjoy the festivities and food with their families until the event was over.

That sounds simple enough until you consider that we gave away over 1,000 bags this year, which means hundreds of families waiting in line to register and pick out a bag. The line was wrapped around the block before the event even opened.

It was also in the afternoon, in August, which meant it was hot, very hot. Even with the snow cones, water bottles, and sprinkler systems set up, it was a long, hot wait in a very long line for these families, not because our people were inefficient – the organization was actually rather impressive- but because there were so many with a need.

So as I watched the children swarm the distribution tables once the event started, I felt honored to be a part of helping meet that need.

That’s when I noticed the boy in the bright green shirt. He was being very kind and patient as he waited for the type of bag he’d picked out. Looking through my lens, I was ready to capture the moment one of the volunteers handed it to him. Instead I was able to grab a different moment.

Glancing around him, he noticed other children opening their backpacks and checking out what pencils and other school supplies were inside them.

And he got excited, seriously excited.

He said, “There is stuff in it?!?”

When one of the workers confirmed that, yes, each bag comes with supplies, he exuberantly and genuinely said, “Oh, wow! Awesome! Thank you!”

And I caught THAT smile.

Honestly, I wish I’d had a video camera instead of just my regular camera at the time.

To think that he had waited in that tremendously long line on an extremely hot day without complaining, in the hopes of getting an empty, though new, backpack. That would have been an amazing enough gift for him.

He was so authentically grateful to receive more than he had expected, something that most of us would take for granted. Some pencils and paper, a box of tissues. He valued it and appreciated it, and he left a mark on my heart.

I know it is often said, in some way or another, that when you teach, you learn, or when you minister, you get ministered to.

I was doing one of the easiest, most fun jobs of the day (I even got in the bounce house for the sake of some cool pictures). It was truly a privilege to be a part of this wonderful ministry and serve with all the generous, hard-working, loving people who helped make it happen. That ministered to me, and it would have been enough of a gift for me.

But God, who always gives more than we expect, said, “Here you go. A beautiful shot, a more beautiful moment. Capture the joy of true thankfulness and remember it.”

Elijah and the Clean Water

How My Children Remind Me to Pray with Gratitude

How to Take Better Pictures of Your Kids