Tag - parenting

Tried It Tuesday: Our Experience with ABCMouse.com

September 8, 2015

When I was pregnant with my second child, part of my “nesting” involved preparing Elijah to no longer be the only child and planning for ways to make that transition easier for him and for us. Knowing that I would be occupied with his little brother quite a bit in the first few months (nursing, changing, rocking, repeat), I was on the lookout for an activity that he could do somewhat independently, that would keep him quiet(ish), and that would be educational, if possible.

I had seen numerous commercials for ABCMouse.com on the preschool channel we watched, and one day I decided to see how much it was and if might be a good idea for Elijah.

When I pulled it up on my computer, I was almost overwhelmed by all that the program offered, but in a good way. I started to sign up, but then decide that maybe I should talk to my hubby first about committing us to a subscription of about $8 a month (billed yearly), even though it did include having two children on one subscription. However, since I’d already entered my email, after I closed out the sign up, I got either a pop-up or an email that gave offered me a “special” rate to join, which brought the price down to about $5 a month. I knew we could do that, so I signed Elijah up, and the two of us began exploring the site. (Since this was a couple of years ago, I’m not sure they still do that, but it’s worth a try!)

From the get-go, he loved it, and I loved it. The program, which is for ages 2-6, starts off with very basic “Toddler Time,” where children learn shapes, colors, letters, and numbers by completing lessons along a curriculum-driven learning “path.” Each lesson is made up of four to six activities (as they graduate up to higher levels, lessons can have more), including coloring pages, games, songs, puzzles, and stories. As the child learns, you can adjust the difficulty levels of the each activity, so even though they might repeat a puzzle as they progress from Toddler Time to Pre-K and Kindergarten lessons, they are still learning new things.

There are plenty of incentives for your child to keep moving along and completing lessons. For each activity completed, they earn virtual tickets to spend in the “stores,” where they can buy outfits for their avatar, items to decorate their “rooms,” or they can even buy and care for numerous virtual pets. At the end of each lesson, they win a “prize,” and at the completion of an entire section – they graduate with a printable certificate and a bigger prize. In our house, we celebrate a graduation with a special treat, too.

Not only can the child follow the specified curriculum in their “classroom,” they can also explore a zoo and a farm, where they learn all about different animals; complete individual basic activities to really focus on a certain area; and watch tons of music videos at the theater. My boys LOVE the videos, which all teach something, including letters, colors, numbers, and seasons. Each child also has a fish tank and a hamster that they can visit and design the tank/cage for. (Elijah and Josiah love rearranging the hamster tubes).

Each time they move through a set of lessons, they are also able to learn about different environments in the world, including the animals and plants that live there, so they are getting some basic science added to their reading, math, art, and music.

When your child first starts, you definitely need to help them in some ways, but the program is designed so that they will easily be able to move through it independently eventually. One of the first lessons when you set up an account is on how to use a computer mouse, and Elijah picked that up really quickly. Of course, you can also access the site through tablets and smart phones, so touch-screen is also an option. And we all know how quickly little guys can learn technology!

The only downside to them being able to move around so easily in the program is that they can leave a lesson without finishing it, click in to exploring the zoo instead of finishing a story in their lesson plan or deciding it’s time to play with the hamsters rather than color the letter P. They won’t move forward in their lesson without completing the activities, though. This mean that most of the time I need to be right beside them, Josiah especially, or at least nearby (doing dishes with him at the kitchen table), so I can monitor what they are working on. Plus that way I also can encourage them or talk them through something if they get stuck.

In our house, the rule is for Elijah to complete two sets of lessons before he can go “off-roading.” For Josiah, it’s at least one whole lesson. (Josiah started even younger than Elijah because he kept watching Elijah use it. Since you can have two children on one subscription, I just added him in when he was old enough, and he started at the beginning, just like Elijah had). We try to have them do ABCMouse (or “B-Mouse” as Josiah calls it) a few times a week at least, and most times, we don’t even have to remind them. They ASK to “play” ABCMouse, sometimes even fighting over who gets to. While I could do without the fighting, I’m thrilled that my boys are so excited to learn.

I’m also very certain that these lessons helped Elijah be more than ready for kindergarten. For example, he knew 22 of the 35 site words for his class the first time he saw the list! He just rattled them off, running right down the page. While I have worked with him a little outside of ABCMouse (not really on words, though), and we read together every day, I was surprised. I know that working in this program, or “playing” it, helped prepare him.

So after at least two years of “trying” ABCMouse.com with our boys, I can easily say that, for us, it is a keeper.

How about you? Any experience with this online program?

Giving Him “Apple Pieces to Put in the Pan”

September 5, 2015

1 Comment

Giving Him Apple Pieces to Put in the Pan, Life in Lape Haven. Sometimes it takes a little extra effort or time for us as moms when our children want to help us throughout our day, but the memories, bonding, and time together are so worth it for them and for us as parents.

When Elijah started kindergarten and was at school for six hours or so every day, Josiah was getting something that he hadn’t really gotten to experience much in his life: hours with Mommy all to himself. He ate it up. And even though I missed Elijah, I also loved having time with my other little guy, too.

This post was first written during that precious time a few years ago when it was just Mommy and Josiah at home during the day. Here is a little look back:

Finding himself without his constant playmate, Josiah has become my little shadow. He will play by himself off and on, but for the most part, he wants to be with Mommy. Generally that means “you play with me, Mommy?” and we do a puzzle or two, color, read books, or play cars, “duck ‘n goose,” or “ring a Rosie” until Mommy HAS to get something done. At that point, he’s either content to be alone, or he’s ready to be my “big helper boy.”

Josiah has discovered a love for vacuuming with me. He wants to be holding the handle the whole time which makes the process take FOREVER, but he’s also learned how helpful it is for him to move the chairs out of my way or pick up his toys really quickly. The other day I got smart and finally pulled out our older vacuum, the one where we can only use it with the attachments. He vacuumed with that thing while I used the good one, and I was able to move a lot quicker while he helped out!

The other task he loves is unloading and loading the dishwasher. He gets super excited when he can stack the plates or the bowls. He is so proud of being “strong” enough to lift them (with Mommy’s very close supervision). He really thrives on being a part.

That’s why earlier this week, he insisted on being my “big helper boy” as I made homemade applesauce. At first I was leaning toward, “Go color” and “Where are your Legos?” or anything that would keep him occupied long enough for me to peel and chop up a large bucketful of dropped apples from my grandparents. I’d had them for a few days, just sitting on the counter, and I knew I had to use them, or I wouldn’t at all.

However, as soon as I was all set up, ready with my paring knife, cutting board, and rinsed apples, there he was, dragging a kitchen chair across the room to the counter. Realizing that having him nearby would be easier than having to keep stepping away from my task to check on him, I relented and let him stand beside me. He even had to have his apron since Mommy had hers.

Before long he was “oohing” and “ewwing” as I trimmed off the bad parts of the apples as I peeled them, and he was utterly fascinated with the couple of worms we found still residing in an apple or two. However, with each enthralled study of the apples, he leaned more and more on my arm, getting closer and closer to the knife in my hands.

So I brought out the big guns – my phone. With the offer of playing a puzzle on Mommy’s phone, while still standing on the chair beside me, he was with me but safer, and I could move a little faster. While I peeled, he slid digital puzzle pieces together to form random animals.

That’s when he started his conversation about the zoo. He knows we have a zoo trip planned in the next couple of weeks, so every animal he completed, he talked about seeing it at the zoo.

“When I go to dee zoo, I see dee lion. I don’t like dee lion. Do you like dee lion?”

So I would answer, “Yes, I like the lions.”

“I don’t. Them scare me.”

And this was our conversation for several animals. He likes to ask the “Do you like? I like/don’t like” questions with explanations for why he likes or doesn’t like something. Generally, he didn’t like animals that he might think “should” be scary.

Suddenly, I hear him say, “When I go to dee zoo, I see dee din-saur.”

Hmmm…“Well, no. We won’t see any dinosaurs. They aren’t at the zoo. There aren’t any dinosaurs anymore. They’re all gone.”

“They gone? They go ‘way.”

Not knowing any other way to say it, I just went for it, “Well, they all died.”

Josiah is really good at being dejected. He’s perfected his show of disappointment with a very adorable, heartfelt, “Awwww,” complete with his head down. Learning that dinosaurs were dead elicited that response and a frown.

Then he was back at his game. “When I go to dee zoo, I see the bird.”(Ostrich). Then he grinned at me with such delight, “They not die!”

I smiled and affirmed, “Nope. They didn’t die.”

“Nope. They not die,” he echoed happily.

In that moment, I wanted to freeze time and just keep him right there with me, little and sweet and innocent. What a funny moment that I might have missed by sending him to play in the other room!

Smiling, I finished cleaning the apples and prepared to start the chopping. When I moved the cutting board and apples closer to the stove, to be near to the pan, Josiah was on it, moving his chair to right in front of the stove.

Again, I hesitated, but he was being so good and wanting to help, so I decided to let him put the chopped apple pieces into the waiting stock pot (since the stove wasn’t on). Being left-handed, I could put him to my right, chop up the apples, then slide them over to the right side, “his” side, of the cutting board, so he could grab them.

Josiah had so much fun picking up the pieces, one at a time mostly, and dropping them carefully into the pan. He didn’t try to eat them or play around. He was very intent on helping Mommy. At first, we counted them as he put them in, up to 20, a couple times, then we worked in silence for a while.

As I diced up another apple, I heard him say softly and so very sweetly, “Thank you for giving me apple pieces to put in dee pan, Mommy.”

I stopped cutting and asked him what he had said, to make sure I’d heard correctly.

He repeated it, “Thank you for giving me apple pieces to put in dee pan.”

With a full heart, I told him he was welcome, then leaned over for a kiss. He grinned all over himself, and I was caught again with the thought that I almost sent him away. I almost missed this.

And he was so appreciative that Mommy was letting him help. He was grateful for the “apple pieces to put in dee pan” just so he could be with me.

I hope I never forget his sweet voice or delighted grin, those chubby fingers plucking up chunks of apples and tossing them joyfully into a big stockpot. I never want to miss an opportunity to let him be with me (within reason), help me (when he feasibly can), talk to me (so we can bond over dead dinosaurs and not-dead ostriches).

On my own, I might have finished my task much quicker, moved onto my next to-do item, and he would have been good playing with his toys alone. However, the time I could have saved would have cost me precious memories. Him, too. Together we now have another moment to store away and cherish, filling up our love banks just like those little apple chunks filled the pan.

It turned out to be really tasty applesauce. It might have been done sooner had I done it alone, but I can guarantee you that it wouldn’t have been nearly as delicious without those little hands that helped. I may never have applesauce again without remembering that day.

I pray it always reminds me to make sure he has apple pieces to put in the pan.

Get more ideas & encouragement from this real-life mom as I experience God’s faithfulness through the joy and chaos of motherhood.

Join my email list!
First Name

Email address:

Honing My Mommy Skills

August 19, 2015

Add comment

Life in Lape Haven: Honing My Mommy Skills

On Sunday, I earned a small feather in my “mothering” cap, a little mental badge of “Way to Go, Mommy!” There was a moment Sunday when I was not only surviving, but I was dominating this adventure of parenthood. It felt pretty great.

We were getting ready for church (and not running late, which is another WIN!). I was in the bathroom, finishing my hair and makeup. Brad was checking the diaper bag and helping our boys get their shoes on the right feet.

Suddenly, I heard Josiah half-crying, half-yelling, with a slight edge of panic in his voice.

And I KNEW. I knew with 100 percent certainty what was going on. I knew this cry. Somehow, I just knew exactly what it meant.

“Brad?” I yelled to the kitchen. “Brad, Josiah is stuck in something. What is he stuck in?”

Then I heard Brad, who hadn’t replied to or acknowledged me, ask Josiah, “How did you do that?”

Again, I yelled to the kitchen. “Is he stuck in something?”

Apparently Brad finally heard me over Josiah’s complaints. “Yes. He got his finger stuck.”

I smiled at myself in the mirror, feeling rather impressed with my mother “skills.” I had called it. I knew his “I’m stuck” cry-whimper. It was like leveling-up in my “mommyness”!

When you bring home your newborn baby, you feel like such a “parent” when you finally start to differentiate your baby’s cries for when he’s hungry, tired, or needs changed. You get to know his reactions to everything: you know which toys he loves, what food he’ll eat, what food he’ll throw over the side, and which people will make him cry just by talking to him.

However, lately, I’ve been fine-tuning my “mother’s sixth sense,” that instinct that makes our kids believe that we have eyes in the back of our head, that certain awareness for knowing exactly what your child is doing without having to be right beside him.

I’ve learned the sound of the refrigerator being opened. I know when they’re being TOO quiet (pretty much ANY TIME one or both boys are quiet and not sleeping). I can tell from something in their laughter that they are wrestling and one of them is sitting, standing, or lying on top of the other one (Do you know how often I say, “Get off of him!” in a single day?).

Now, I wish I could say it’s just because I’m awesome that I can tell Josiah’s “I’m stuck” cry-whimper from his “I’m just faking this” cry, but that’s not it.

And it’s not just because I have to, although it does help to prevent certain disasters when I can anticipate or at least catch them doing some things BEFORE they do it.

It’s actually really simple. It’s because I know Josiah. I know Elijah. After spending nearly every single day of their lives with them, including their time in utero, I know my children very, very well.

As I looked at myself in the mirror, feeling excited with my “momtasticness” (I don’t know if that’s a word, but I like it), God dropped a verse in my heart.

“The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles.” (Psalm 34:17)

The Bible tells us that when we call out to God, He will answer us and help us, but I’d never really thought about the fact that, just like other parents, God knows what each of our cries mean. He can tell OUR “I’m stuck” cry-whimper from our “I’m just faking this” cry. (Hmmm…)

He hears, and He delivers us from our troubles.

God knows what we need because He knows us (also because He’s God). And while I’ve only been a mother for a little over 5 years, God has been a Father for quite a bit longer. He’s got this parenting thing perfected. He’s known us from before we were born, before we were even conceived, and He knows not only our past, but God has already written out His plans for our future. (Psalm 139:13-16, Jeremiah 29:11).

So while I felt pretty “parenting level: expert” on Sunday morning, as much as I love my boys, pay attention to their intricacies and quirks, and can anticipate to the second when a meltdown is going to hit, God reminded me that my skills are just a drop in the bucket compared to how capable, equipped, and on-it He is when it comes to caring for His children.

The Verse that Became My “Mommy Motto”

July 28, 2015

5 Comments

Life in Lape Haven: The Verse that Became My Mommy Motto

At some point last summer, after a day of answering every “why” question that my then 4-year-old could come up with and changing my toddler out of yet another soaked outfit (Is there a sippy cup that doesn’t leak? We have not found one), I began looking for a Bible verse or quote that would encourage me as a wife, mom, and person in those moments when I felt overwhelmed, ill-equipped, or just plain exhausted.

I had the perfect spot for this inspiration: a cute little chalkboard in my kitchen.

Any mom who has ever had to prepare a meal with one child crying and hanging on her leg while the other complains of being hungry (Can you not see what I’m doing? Do you not smell the chicken roasting in the oven?) knows that the kitchen can be a battle zone of frustration and patience worn thin at the end of the day.

Searching for an uplifting “something” to help me refocus in those crazy moments, I flipped through my Bible and searched online for a verse that was encouraging, simple…and short enough to fit on the chalkboard.

I looked for the word “joy” or “joyful” because in my heart, that’s the kind of mom and wife and person that I want to be. If I’m not diligent in guarding it, my joy can be the first victim of a rough day.

When I came across Romans 12:12, it was as though all the things I needed to be reminded of in my calling as “Mommy” and “Mrs.” were efficiently, concisely summed up for me in 10 little words. (God’s cool like that.)

It says, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”

Joyful. Patient. Faithful. It’s become my “mommy motto.”

Joyful in Hope

Being joyful seems as though it should be easy. I’m doing what I love – making a home for my family. I have funny, silly kids, who are smart, healthy, and imaginative. I have a hubby who loves us all and works hard to provide for us. All together we have a happy, loving home.

But as I said before, there are times when I can allow my joy to be stolen away – whiny children, disagreements with my husband, faulty expectations of perfection for myself. Parenting and marriage aren’t easy. If I don’t keep myself grounded in God’s Word and His presence, it can be even harder. After all, He is my hope. Trusting in His plans for me and His strength daily, I am reminded that my children (and husband) are truly gifts from God, given to me because He knew that with Him, I could be the mom (and wife) that they need.

Patient in Affliction

Okay, I’m not saying my family is an “affliction.” Far from it – they are a blessing. However, conflict, struggle, and potty training can test a mommy’s patience…especially potty training. Many of my days would have better outcomes if I allowed a little more understanding and patience to direct my words and actions. We all make mistakes, we are all flawed human beings, and we are all in the process of learning and growing, especially our children. Remembering how much patience God has with me, I know that I can strive to be a more patient girl, no matter how difficult or trying the circumstance.

Faithful in Prayer

I think that maybe this phrase should have been first on the list – as in, “Faithful in prayer, patient in affliction, and joyful in hope” – because our relationship with God is the foundation to everything in our life, and there is no relationship if you aren’t talking to and listening to Him daily, faithfully. My joy comes from time in His presence and resting in Him. My patience is strengthened when I have a real understanding of God’s grace and mercy toward me. If I’m not spiritually ready to face a day, I’m shooting myself in the foot.

Furthermore, I need to be faithful to cover my husband and children in prayer for God’s guidance and protection. That is one of my greatest responsibilities and privileges as a wife and mother. There is an enemy out there who wants “to steal, kill, and destroy,” and I am not going to take it lightly. I can take authority over strife or confusion or fear in our family rather than let the enemy’s plans succeed in our home.

So that’s the verse I doodled out on my cute little chalkboard in the kitchen after a particularly trying day, and it’s been there, exactly as I wrote it out, for close to a year now.

Has this past year been smooth sailing, all rainbows and sunshine? Are my children perfectly behaved angels and my hubby never irritating and always chick-flick-hero perfect? Um, no.

But I know there are days that could have been horrible, disastrous even, had I not taken a second to remind myself of that verse and correct MY behavior, change MY perspective, or seek God for wisdom or intervention in MY situation.

Because God’s Word is never meant to change “them.” It’s always meant to change “me.”

What is your go-to verse for encouragement on tough days?

Get a free printable of this verse here!

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE:

How to Easily Create Beautiful Chalkboard Lettering

Our “Vision Verse” for Our Children

5 Everyday Moments that Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It

Trying & Tying: Teaching Our Kids to Do Hard Things

July 20, 2015

4 Comments

Life in Lape Haven: Trying & Tying - Elijah finally tied his shoelaces

If at first you don’t succeed, tie, tie again….

With Elijah starting kindergarten this fall, we’ve been working to prepare him for this important milestone. (Mommy might not be as ready, but that’s another story). We’ve talked about what to expect during his school day, how he should behave, what skills he should have, and we know he’s ready academically, thanks to his own intelligence and his lessons on ABCMouse.com.

However, one of his biggest struggles has been learning to tie his shoes. It seemed simple enough when we started teaching him a few months ago. He had the incentive of needing to know before he went to school, and we knew he had the capability both mentally and physically. So, why is it that just last week he finally got it?

The reason was annoyingly simple (Extra annoying because I KNEW what the problem was): He didn’t want to TRY.

That was it. He stubbornly refused to attempt to tie his shoes, at least without a big to-do about how hard it was. Every time he had to put shoes on, his first defense was to announce that he wanted to wear his flip-flops. When that got shot down because of the weather (rain and flip-flops don’t mix well) or the amount of walking we’d be doing (flip-flops aren’t great for hikes in the woods), he went to either “I don’t know how, so it’ll save time if YOU do it for me” (nice try) or straight to “I don’t want to.” (Our favorite) Fun.

It wasn’t as if Brad and I were being tyrants about it, punishing him for not getting it perfect or never helping him. Nope. I had shown him – slowly – many, many, many times, and he knew how to do the initial single tie part, where you cross the laces, flip one under the other, and pull it tight. He’d actually been doing that himself for several months whenever he put on his shoes. If he ever actually attempted to finish tying the laces, we gave him help when he got stuck.

But ask him to keep trying or practicing, and a battle ensued. Every time.

Then finally last week, the heavens opened, and angels sang “The Hallelujah Chorus.” At the end of that day’s battling, Elijah managed to finish tying his shoe without any help whatsoever. He went from a grumpy, obstinate boy to a glowing, proud, capable boy in an instant.

He smiled at me and said, “Now I don’t have to be whiney or complain anymore!”

My response was, “Wow. Good job. I’m proud of you. But you know, you didn’t HAVE to be whiney or complain, even before you could tie your shoes. You CHOSE to.” He gave me a sheepish smile and nodded, “Yeah, I know.”

It would be easy (VERY easy) to be frustrated at that kind of reply if I didn’t realize how incredibly human it was.

We’ve all acted that way at some point and probably more often than we’d care to admit. If we have a task where we are faced with the possibility of failure or not knowing exactly what we’re doing or having to exert more effort to accomplish it, we’re tempted to not even bother. We’ll use lots of excuses and be disagreeable or whiney in the process. Of course, once we conquer that something difficult, everything’s sunshine and happiness.

The thing I kept stressing to Elijah was that he’ll face lots of hard things in life and avoiding them doesn’t make them disappear. I’ve always told my boys, “I don’t want you to tell me, ‘I can’t.’ I want you to say, ‘I tried.’” You may not accomplish your goal on the first attempt – in fact, you probably won’t. But until you actually try, you never, ever will.

I want him to realize that the quickest way to get past something hard is to try, then try again, and then keep trying. We all know “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again,” and “practice makes perfect.” We know that, but the DOING of it is where we struggle.

And as Christians, I think we should really be killing it on “doing hard things.” Why? Because we have the very Spirit of God living inside us, the Spirit who raised Christ from the dead! Talk about a hard thing…oh, wait. “With God, all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)

Remember, Philippians 4:13, says, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” (I repeated this verse over and over during both un-medicated deliveries of my boys because labor is hard…yes, worth it – but HARD.)

In addition, since we know that God is helping us to do whatever it is that we are facing, we don’t have to be whiney or complaining about it. We really don’t. For one, that gives no glory to God, and let’s be honest, it doesn’t make us look good, either.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21) Saying over and over again, “I can’t,” “This is too hard,” “I’ll never get it,” will not help you accomplish a hard task. It will only make facing that task more miserable.

So we each have a choice: Face hard things bravely and with the determination to do our best and rely on God to help us succeed (or at least to have made a tremendous effort); or sit back, complain, and never come close to succeeding.

This might seem like a lot to expect a 5-year-old to understand and get from learning to tie his shoes, but I know he can, just like we can – if we trust God and TRY.

Embracing the Moments of “Mommy Sadness”

Trusting God Through Kindergarten

Why Our Child Goes to Public School