Life in Lape Haven

Category - Parenting

The Ministry of the Maintenance Man

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

This past weekend, our family had the joy of celebrating the wedding of some very dear friends who are really more like family.

Having known the groom, Jeremy, since he was a sophomore in high school and I was one of his youth leaders, he’s kind of like another little brother to me. When he and Brad met not long after Brad and I started dating, the two guys became close friends pretty quickly.  In fact, Brad had the honor of serving as the Best Man this weekend, which meant we were involved with lots of the pre-wedding events leading up to the big day.

Knowing all the behind the scenes things that need to happen before a bride walks down the aisle, both from planning our own wedding and others that we’ve either been in or helped with, Brad and I were more than willing to do whatever they needed us to so that Jeremy and his beautiful bride, Rachel, could have a wonderful event on Saturday.

We made the over-two-hour trip to northeast Ohio on Thursday so that Brad and the other groomsmen could take Jeremy on his bachelor outing of rock climbing, shooting, and dinner that evening. Then on Friday, we joined others from the bridal party and the bride’s family in a day of decorating and rehearsal.

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

That was when we all met Mike, the maintenance man at Jeremy and Rachel’s church. He was an older man, about my parents’ age, and he was there to basically let us into the church and the student center (where the reception would be held) and show us where everything was that we might need. However, he did much more than that.

From the moment we stepped into the first building to decorate for the reception, he was a cheerful presence, quick to help out and gracious about any request or questions we had. Nothing was an inconvenience to him. He was great with my boys (which all moms know is the key to our hearts), allowing them to be little boys. He even gave them permission to run a few laps in the sanctuary later, which I had to veto not long after when they started trying to climb over the pews!

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

While talking about my boys, he shared with me about how he came to Jesus in his 30s and how he knew God’s timing was in that because his children got to witness firsthand how his life changed completely from who he was before Christ to the new man he became.

Mike found great joy in being able to help Jeremy & Rachel prepare for their special day, and he did his best to take on any task he could to help alleviate their stress or nervousness. Since that was my mission, too, when I wasn’t corralling my boys, he would tell me things that someone needed to know but ones that he didn’t want to bother the bride and groom with at the moment, such as where the candles were for the candelabras on the platform or asking to make sure that everything went well with the rehearsal and sound.

On the day of the wedding, he was there just as early as we were, keeping Jeremy informed about rearranged tables and such and, again, trying to do what he could to help.

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

While the bridal party, Brad included, were getting ready and Jeremy was in the lobby getting his pictures, I tried to keep my boys out of the way and busy with coloring in the sanctuary. They had been really good over the busy day before and were excited that it was “wedding day,” so they were having a hard time not wanting to be in on everything that was going on. That’s when Josiah decided to use his red crayon to draw a nice long line down the light-colored pew, right on the front of the seat back, so it was very obvious. As soon as I saw it, I cringed. I knew it was NOT the washable kind of crayon. Then I glanced up, and I could see Jeremy through the double doors, posing for the photographer, and I cringed again.

There was no way I was going to bother him with this, but I knew just who to find to help me out.

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

Not two minutes later, there was Mike, walking through the front doors, so I hurried over to him. Knowing how kind and patient he had been with my children the day before, I knew he would be understanding with this little disaster. Even still, I hated to have to tell him. (If your child has ever damaged or destroyed someone else’s property, even accidentally, I’m sure you know how I felt.) Quickly and quietly I explained that my 3-year-old had gotten a little carried away with his coloring, and I apologized. (I did try to clean it off as best I could without making it worse. Note: My old reliable, hand sanitizer, did help a little but not enough.)

His response was exactly what I’d come to expect from him, “That’s ok. We have children in here every Sunday, and we have this all the time. Show me which pew it is, and we’ll take care of it.”

I had Josiah apologize, and even though I could tell he didn’t want to do it, I could also tell that he wasn’t afraid of Mike’s reaction either. Mike simply said, “It’s ok. I’ll fix it. But now you know not to do that again, huh?” And that was it. He reassured me that it happened often and that he had a cleaner that would take it right out. He told me not to worry about it.

I know from my years of growing up in the church that some people would have reacted differently, berating my child or me for desecrating God’s house or being very put out with the situation. Thankfully, this man showed us compassion and grace.

Beyond telling Brad, Mike and I neither one mentioned it to anyone else, least of all Jeremy or Rachel. (I guess now they’ll know 🙂 …)

Life in Lape Haven: The Ministry of the Maintenance Man. While it takes a lot of people to make a wedding come together well, one of the most important people at our friends' recent wedding was the seemingly behind the scenes maintenance man who did represented his church and Jesus well.

Of all the wonderful people we met this weekend (and there were many), Mike left the biggest impact on my heart simply by being a joyful, willing, humble servant who was eager to help beyond his job description to make my friends’ wedding goes as smoothly as possible and who shared God’s love with all of us. He not only represented his church well, but Christ well, too. He used his generally behind-the-scenes position to minister to everyone he came into contact with.

So even though the photographer was great, the pastor who officiated was wise and eloquent, and the caterers provided us with some delicious food, it was the maintenance man who contributed the most to a beautiful day for us all.

Thanks, Mike!

Trusting God through Kindergarten: A look back at my son’s first year of school

Life in Lape Haven: Trusting God through Kindergarten: A look back at my son's first year of school. Sending my first child to school meant trusting God with my precious treasure. From the first day of school to the last day of class, God has proven to be more than faithful, and Elijah has been used to share the love of Jesus with everyone around him. God's plan is always better than we can imagine.
It seems like only yesterday that Elijah graduated from kindergarten.

Remembering how emotional I felt sending my little guy off to school for the very first time back in August, it was amazing to look back over the year, and see how much Elijah has grown and how God has been with him (and me) every step of the way.

Not only did Elijah flourish in a classroom environment, largely thanks to a wonderful teacher who encouraged his nonstop creativity and insatiable curiosity, but he continually shared the love of God to those around him. Many people have wondered at our decision to send our child to public school to begin with, but from early on, God showed Himself faithful in keeping Elijah, and Elijah’s young faith gave him a boldness to proclaim Jesus in numerous ways throughout the year.

Life in Lape Haven: Trusting God through Kindergarten: A look back at my son's first year of school. Sending my first child to school meant trusting God with my precious treasure. From the first day of school to the last day of class, God has proven to be more than faithful, and Elijah has been used to share the love of Jesus with everyone around him. God's plan is always better than we can imagine.

From dealing with the class “bully” with prayer and compassion (he watched out for her, encouraged her, and prayed for her all year long) to inviting his teacher to church (she came), to spending a recess, on his own initiative, praying on the playground, to talking to his friends about Jesus, Elijah used his time in school to learn…and to teach, reminding me (and others) of the power of simply living out our faith daily.

One of the most fascinating ways I could see this is through one of the coolest things his kindergarten teacher did with the kids over the year: a daily journal. It’s amazing to journey through the pages, seeing how his handwriting and writing improved, how well his vocabulary grew, and how good he became at expressing himself, both with words and pictures. It also gave us a glimpse into what he was thinking about during his days. It is a precious treasure full of childlike randomness, humor, and sweetness.

A lot of his early entries are just random words he was learning, but he incorporated a lot about “Mom,” “Dad,” and “Josiah” from the get-go. Not long into the year, though, he has the sentence “Jesus loves me and Mom,” with a picture of one giant stick figure with a huge heart and two smaller stick people – Jesus, Mom, and Elijah (haha – sorry to my husband!).


It was nothing flashy or meant to get attention. It was just him sharing what he knew and what he was thinking about that day. Later he also shared “I am in the Bible” (as in the Prophet Elijah, his favorite Bible story for obvious reasons), and later, “Quiz: Who is the baddest in the world? Devil!” (Haha.)

Of course, he had less “spiritual” entries to balance it out. There was “I love Mom # (hashtag). I love Dad # (hashtag)” (too much watching Mommy post on social media), and “I see a squirrel eating my head” (complete with a picture of a giant squirrel with teeth, chomping on a stickman’s head), and lots of references to various video games, Charlie Brown, and Star Wars. So, yeah, he was still very much a 5-year-old boy, a 5-year-old boy who loves Jesus, but a 5-year-old boy.

As part of his end-of-the-year thank you gift for his teacher, Elijah decided to draw a picture of everyone in his kindergarten class for her on a piece of posterboard. Since Elijah is the creative type, he knew how he wanted to do it, and he only took a little direction from me when I helped him make sure he had a list of all the kids in his class and room to draw them, so that no one was left off accidentally. He spent three evenings working on his drawings, writing each person’s name with their stick person. He’d sprawl out on the kitchen floor with his pencil, markers, and list of names while I worked on dishes and dinner.

On the second night of work, I turned around to see him coloring a huge cross off to the side of the page, and I asked him,

“What’s that?”

He glanced up, then kept coloring, “That’s for God,” he answered as he wrote the letters G-O-D along the cross.

“I thought you were drawing the people in your class,” I questioned, thinking he was just getting bored with the huge task of drawing 24 different kids and getting a little off-task.

His answer was perfect: “Well, God IS in my class.”

I smiled at him and agreed, “Yeah, you’re right. He is. He’s the most important person in that classroom.”

Life in Lape Haven: Trusting God through Kindergarten: A look back at my son's first year of school. Sending my first child to school meant trusting God with my precious treasure. From the first day of school to the last day of class, God has proven to be more than faithful, and Elijah has been used to share the love of Jesus with everyone around him. God's plan is always better than we can imagine.

Watching him draw out a picture of God and then Jesus on his classroom poster, I was overwhelmed, realizing that this little boy – he gets it. Deep down and boldly out loud, he knows that God is with him, that God loves him and everyone else, that God wants him to love everyone else, that God is his source and hope, and that God answers prayer.

And while some of his outspokenness and confidence comes from his personality, it is nice to see, over and over again, that what we’re teaching him at home through devotionals, Bible stories and songs, and trying to model for him through our every day lives, is solidifying his foundation in Christ. What he’s receiving every Sunday in Children’s Church from his Children’s Pastors and teachers and throughout the week from being around all of his grandparents and family is strengthening and growing his faith.

It makes me think of the scriptures in Ephesians 4,

“And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11-13)

Life in Lape Haven: Trusting God through Kindergarten: A look back at my son's first year of school. Sending my first child to school meant trusting God with my precious treasure. From the first day of school to the last day of class, God has proven to be more than faithful, and Elijah has been used to share the love of Jesus with everyone around him. God's plan is always better than we can imagine.

I don’t know what calling God has for Elijah as he grows, but Elijah is already letting God use him. It’s a good thing we’ve all been working together to equip this little saint because he was doing the work of ministry in his own childlike way from his kindergarten classroom.

 

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My Strategy to Thrive During Summer Vacation

Life in Lape Haven: My Strategy to Thrive During Summer Vacation. WIth a plan for flexible structure, individual responsibilities and chores, and lots of fun activities this summer, I hope that our family can more than survive summer vacation. Lots of helpful links for how we can thrive as a family, enjoy our time together, and make great memories.

We are only about a week from the start of Elijah’s summer vacation. Over the last two weeks, thanks to built-in school calamity days that didn’t get used this winter, Elijah has had Fridays off, and I’ve had a small glimpse of what it’s going to be like to have all my boys at home all day again.

It hasn’t been pretty.

You would think that it wouldn’t be that big of a deal. I mean, I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for nearly eight years. I’ve dealt with my boys being with me all day, done my grocery shopping and errands with them all in tow, and managed to cook meals and keep the house clean while they are clamoring for attention or fighting with each other.

But apparently, I’ve gotten soft over this school year, used to the ease of having only two children for most of the day.

From previous summer vacation experience, I know I needed to start preparations now if we’re going to have a good summer all together. So, I have put together a 3-point strategy to survive our summer vacation.

Life in Lape Haven: My Strategy to Thrive During Summer Vacation. WIth a plan for flexible structure, individual responsibilities and chores, and lots of fun activities this summer, I hope that our family can more than survive summer vacation. Lots of helpful links for how we can thrive as a family, enjoy our time together, and make great memories.

1. STRUCTURE

Not only do children need it, but I accomplish so much more when I have an organized plan of action for my day. Now that I’ll have both older boys again, I’ll need to adjust my school-year daily schedule and transition it to a summer vacation daily routine.

I say “routine” because I’m not going to set specific times for everything, but maybe more just a general idea of what we should be doing “around-about” when. I don’t intend to schedule every moment of our day – that’s just a recipe for frustration when you have children. Flexibility is key! For example, if my boys would by some miracle actually sleep in, I’m not waking them up for a scheduled breakfast unless we have to be somewhere that day. Nope – if that would happen, we will all revel in it, and I’d totally take advantage of it! 🙂

(Of course, I’m not counting on many of those days because even now, they pop out of bed on the weekends (or days off school) earlier than even school days because, as Josiah says, “it’s sunny now.”)

Not only do I plan to have a general schedule for the day, but I’m also going to make sure that the boys know how the day should go.  While looking for inspiration for my summer strategy, I saw this cute printable Morning Checklist for kids from Not Consumed. Since we won’t be doing school work over the summer, I may recreate this idea and make it fit our plans, but the idea is great.

I love that the checklist includes a devotional time and a reminder to do daily chores because my next strategy point goes right along with that.

2. RESPONSIBILITIES

Since my older two boys are getting old enough to take on a few daily chores, this is definitely something we’re going to incorporate into our summer strategy. Right now, Elijah’s big responsibilities have been feeding our dog and bringing down his dirty clothes in the morning, while Josiah just gets to help Mommy throughout the day as he can.

Life in Lape Haven: My Strategy to Thrive During Summer Vacation. WIth a plan for flexible structure, individual responsibilities and chores, and lots of fun activities this summer, I hope that our family can more than survive summer vacation. Lots of helpful links for how we can thrive as a family, enjoy our time together, and make great memories.

Josiah likes helping whenever it means he gets to play in the dirt.

This summer, I’m going to up the ante a bit for them both by adding an item or two to their daily chores. I’m sure they are going to LOVE this part. (Hahahaha).

Of course, since they are both still learning, I know that they will need a lot of instruction and supervision, at least at first, with some of the more “big kid” tasks. However, teaching them now means they’ll be really good at it when they get older. 🙂 (My mom was awesome for “encouragement” and an answer when we were young and doing chores. If we complained that we did it all the time, she’d tell us, “Then you should be able to do it quickly and really well.” If we tried to use the excuse that we weren’t good at it or didn’t know how, guess what? “Now, you can practice/learn.” Haha.)

For help with this strategy point, I’ve pooled all kinds of resources from Pinterest, including age-appropriate chore ideas and printable chore charts.

Preschool Chore Charts

15 Chores Ideas for 4-year-olds

34 Free Printable Chore Charts for Kids of All Ages

38 Age-Appropriate Chores for Kids

Editable Chore Cards for Kids (This one even gives them step-by-step directions!)


3. ACTIVITIES

Of course, I won’t expect my boys to spend the summer slaving away for me. I’m definitely not going to!

So, I need to have a healthy stash of activities ready to go once we’ve completed all our responsibilities for the day. I already know that my boys enjoy visiting the nearby parks, plus we plan to participate in our library’s summer reading program, and we can always visit family and friends for play dates. For what we can do at home, my boys like our Homemade Sidewalk Paint and playing with bubbles or on their swing set, so those are always on the list, but I’ve also gathered some new ideas for ways to make memories and spend a fun summer afternoon.

Life in Lape Haven: My Strategy to Thrive During Summer Vacation. WIth a plan for flexible structure, individual responsibilities and chores, and lots of fun activities this summer, I hope that our family can more than survive summer vacation. Lots of helpful links for how we can thrive as a family, enjoy our time together, and make great memories.

One of the easiest summer activities that my boys love is going on a picnic.

50 Fun and Free Summer Activities for Kids

32 Summer Boredom Busters 

Summer Activity Schedule for Kids (Free Printable)

Summer Bucket List – 150+ Activities for Kids

21 Fun Summer Activities

And if they seem to find that structure, responsibilities, and the activities I’ve come up with aren’t enough, I’ve also found this great little printable to help them out when they think they are “bored.” (Elijah likes that word lately, so this is definitely going up in his room.) 🙂

Having been through “summer vacation” before, I know that my strategy isn’t all that we’ll need, but having a plan is better than being completely unprepared, right? Hopefully with a little organization, planning, and advance preparation, we can sail through this summer fairly happily, making great memories and enjoying the time we have together so much that we’ll hate to see it end. My hope for this summer vacation is to more than survive it. I want us to thrive in it together as a family. That sounds like a good plan to me. 🙂

 WHAT IS YOUR SUMMER SURVIVAL STRATEGY?

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The Importance of Storytelling Daddies

Life in Lape Haven: The Importance of Storytelling Daddies. There is just something about playing make-believe or listening to adventurous stories told by your daddy. It's a great way to create memories and bond with your children in a way they will always remember.

When I was little, maybe about four or five, I can remember lying down beside my dad in our little side porch/sun room, with my older brother on the other side of him. It was either afternoon or early evening, so maybe Dad was keeping us occupied so my mom could get my younger brother down for a nap. I don’t remember that part. What I remember most is that we were listening to my father tell us stories about “Ishewa,” a little Native American boy who always seemed to have great adventures, and that day he was going on a bear hunt with his father.

I mentioned the “Ishewa stories” to my dad a while ago, and he was surprised that I remembered them. I don’t remember too many of the storylines, just that my dad was a great storyteller, and I loved the characters that he made up for us. His affinity for American history, including Native American life (his paternal grandmother was part Cherokee), and his hobbies of hunting and fishing and general rambles in the woods combined to give his stories authenticity and a slightly educational element, but he always made them fun and exciting. His tales might be one of the things that encouraged my love for historical fiction books. 🙂

Given how much I like to read and write, you’d think that I’d be the storyteller in our little family, but I’m not. While I do make up stories for our boys on occasion and sometimes even sing them per Elijah’s request, which is harder, my stories are always random.

When our children look back at their childhood, the stories I’m certain they’ll both remember best are the ones their daddy tells them and enacts with them. Those stories are called “Big Bad Bear, Baby Bear, Little Boy, Big Boy, and Monkey in the Woods.” (Yeah, it’s a mouthful…)

IMG_2214-5

Started when Josiah was still a little one, these kooky adventures take place when Daddy and the boys go upstairs to play together. It’s a combination game and storytelling, as they come up with new “episodes” every time they play. (Elijah tends to think of these stories like a TV series.) Daddy narrates, and the boys offer suggestions of what will happen “today on this episode of ‘Big Bad Bear, Baby Bear, Little Boy, Big Boy, and Monkey in the Woods.’” While Josiah is “Little Boy,” and Elijah is known as “Big Boy,” they use their stuffed animals for the rest of the characters. “Big Bad Bear” is a gray bear puppet whose character is more grumpy than bad. “Monkey” is one of those toy monkeys with really long arms and legs that you can Velcro around you, and he’s a crazy, clumsy monkey who always ends up falling down our stairs. “Baby Bear” is the teddy bear that Elijah snuggles at night. They also always visit “Grandma Monkey” at some point in the story, and she cooks them yummy food.

I don’t know all the craziness that goes on, but I hear it: the laughter, the running, Brad doing silly voices, and my boys having a wonderful time. I’ve been tempted to join in before, but this is their thing with Daddy. It’s more special that way.

If a father telling his son stories that include the child’s stuffed animals sounds familiar, you may be thinking of A.A. Milne, who did the same thing with his little boy, Christopher Robin, and his teddy bear, Winnie the Pooh. Apparently fathers and storytelling is a thing in more than our family.

And for good reason. While Brad’s storytelling technique is definitely different than my dad’s (and far different than A.A. Milne’s), the end results are pretty much the same: memories, bonding, a shared adventure, and children who know that they are important to their daddy because he takes time to play and imagine with them. (They also give moms a break. Haha)

As moms we have lots of opportunities with our children to bond and make memories. They know we love them because we snuggle them, kiss boo-boos, make them cookies, sing them songs, read them stories, and 50 million other things throughout a day. It’s kind of easy for us.

But our kids need special moments with their daddies, too. Who better to lead them on wild (pretend) adventures and daring (imagined) feats than their big, strong daddy? (Remember, I’m a girl, and my father was telling me about a bear hunt, not a princess tea party, and I still cherish that story).

So, mamas, step back (if you have to) and give them those moments, and daddies, take them. Make time to spend with your little ones just playing make-believe, and create stories together that they’ll remember for the rest of the lives.

Because, trust me, they may forget the storylines over time, but they’ll never forget you were the one telling the story.

Feature image courtesy of Picture Bliss Photography.

The Year Mother’s Day Changed for Me

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

It was Mother’s Day Sunday in 2010, and I was about 4 weeks from Elijah’s due date (although he would be born in just 3 weeks). My little guy was doing ninja kicks and flips in my belly throughout the service at church, making it hard to concentrate on much besides him.

Then came the moment they acknowledged mothers throughout the congregation, and the usher passed out a small gift to each mommy present.

When I was bypassed, one of the older moms reminded him, “You forgot Kishona.”

His reply, “Well, she’s not really a mother yet.”

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

I was a little surprised, a little embarrassed, and yes, a little hurt. My child was right there, with me, pressing on my ribs as I glanced at my husband, unsure of what to say. I didn’t really care about the little trinket, but to be told that I didn’t qualify as a mother when I very much so felt like one already…

I didn’t have to say anything, though, because the other mothers around me immediately came to my defense. They understood that being a mother doesn’t just start when the baby is placed in your arms.

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

For me, in my heart, I was a mother the moment I saw those two pink lines on the pregnancy test. That was the moment everything I did became about that little one I was carrying – how I ate, what I did, even forcing myself to rest.

For eight months, I had put up with nausea, horrible dysgeusia (constant disgusting taste in my mouth), heartburn, restless nights, and more recently, random people wanting to touch my belly. I had prayed over this baby, sung to him, and talked to him all the time. He responded to my voice and touch. I already knew a bit of his personality and could tell he was going to be a stubborn one just by how he reacted with kicks whenever I would roll over to my left side at night.

So, to be told that I wasn’t “really” a mom yet was kind of upsetting.

I totally understood that I had not had all of the “mom” experiences yet, but you’re not a mom based on your experiences or how old your children are or how many you have. All that might make you a more prepared or wiser mom, but being a mother is based on the love you have for your child.

Sadly, I was not the only mama overlooked that day. And while I was defended by the older moms, this mama was not.

Because she didn’t have a pregnant belly or a toddler in the nursery or a child by her side. Few knew that she had miscarried a little boy the year before. She and her husband were newer in the church, and even so, some women never share that deeply personal and heartbreaking struggle and grief.

I didn’t realize it until after service when I overheard her husband comforting her.

And my heart broke.

Suddenly, I saw Mother’s Day as I hadn’t ever before. Not just as a joyful celebration of my wonderful mother and grandmothers and all my hopes of being a good mom, too, but as potentially the most difficult day of the year for those unacknowledged mothers and those longing to be mommies, quietly hurting in the background.

It made the day more precious to me because it was suddenly tinged with bittersweetness. When you have something so beautiful and cherished, you want that for everyone.

Now every Mother’s Day, as I celebrate with my husband, our families, and our little boys, I can’t help but think about and pray for those women who are grieving through infertility, miscarriages, and loss, acknowledging them and defending their place in the ranks of motherhood.

As moms and even those praying to be a mom, the hopes and love we have for our children bond us in a unique way and give us a unique opportunity to support and encourage each other in our mothering journey. We may not have the same experiences and struggles, and it might seem unfairly easy or difficult for some compared to others. However, who better to come alongside us than another woman who shares our central desire of being the mothers God wants us to be.

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

This Sunday, pray for mothers – all of them: the exhausted moms, the new moms who feel overwhelmed, the moms grieving the children they’ve never held or will never hold again, the moms missing their own mothers, the expectant moms, the single moms, the moms-still-waiting-to-be, and even the moms enjoying the day with their families. They all need your prayers, encouragement, and acknowledgement.

Happy Mother’s Day.

 

“Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.” – Ricki Lake


 

Get more ideas & encouragement from this real-life mom as I experience God’s faithfulness through the joy and chaos of motherhood.

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5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It

5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It, Life in Lape Haven. Being a parent is hard, and some days are difficult. However, even on the roughest days, there are moments that can remind us of how wonderful it is to be a mom or dad and how precious our children are to us.

As a mom, I know that some days, parenting is just hard. Children can be demanding, cranky, destructive (usually accidentally), disobedient, whiny, messy, and just exhausting. However, I have found that even on those really rough days, there are still moments sprinkled throughout the chaos that remind me that my children are truly gifts from God and being a mom really is worth it.

Here are five of my favorite everyday moments that make being a mother the best calling ever.

5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It, Life in Lape Haven. Being a parent is hard, and some days are difficult. However, even on the roughest days, there are moments that can remind us of how wonderful it is to be a mom or dad and how precious our children are to us.

1. Cuddles and Snuggles:

My boys are all pretty affectionate little guys, and they love cuddles and snuggles. Whether it’s climbing into bed with Mommy and Daddy on Saturday morning (so much sweeter when they wait until after 8 am!), or just scooting up really close to us on the couch, our boys are cuddlers. They want to be with us.

Josiah likes to sit beside me as I’m typing or editing pictures, laying his little hand on my lower arm and his head against my upper arm, and just watch me. Elijah’s tall enough now that he can almost rest his head on my shoulder. Even the most frustrating days can be softened when they are being sweet and tender like that.

 

2. Giggles:

No matter how bad a day is, my boys will be laughing at some point, those deep-belly giggles that are impossible to resist. They can be fighting and arguing with each other one minute, then laughing with each other the next. And their joy is contagious. Of course, it’s even better when I get to be the one to bring out the giggles in them with silliness and tickles and fun. Laughter is a beautiful remedy for discouragement and exhaustion (I laugh even easier when I’m tired. Haha!) After all, the Bible tell us, “A merry heart does good, like medicine.” (Proverbs 17:22)

 

3. Unexpected Hugs & Kisses:

Having mentioned our boys’ affectionate natures, is it any surprise that I get treated to random hugs and kisses throughout my day? Josiah’s thing is to give me “all the hugs in the world,” which is basically a really tight, prolonged clinging sort of hug. Even though he will have moments when he doesn’t want ME to give HIM hugs or kisses, he loves to surprise me with them.

Elijah, however, has never rejected a hug that I can remember. He’ll give me a “good morning hug,” a hug before and after school, and hugs “just because” throughout the day, but his specialty is his bedtime hug, where he basically lets you think you’re just leaning down for one last kiss before he goes to sleep, and he’ll latch on, both arms around your neck, and keep you there. (And giggle.) He’s surprisingly strong for his age. He’s also the most likely to come up and give Mom random kisses on the cheek.


 

4. “I love you, Mommy”:

I don’t know if there is anything more encouraging or refreshing on a difficult day than when your child looks you in the eyes and sweetly and sincerely tells you, “I love you, Mommy.” Even if they are echoing your words with an “I love you, too,” it has a way of refocusing you to how blessed you are to be the mother of that child (yes, that one, the one who just a few minutes ago flushed his training underwear down the toilet – true story. Or that one, who is so driven to create that he keeps ransacking the kitchen junk drawer and recycle bin, even when he’s been told not to, to “make something,” leaving crazy messes and empty tape dispensers in his wake.)

I also cherish their unique compliments of “You look like a princess, Mommy,” or “I like how your hair feels, Mom.”

 

5. Watching My Babies Sleep:

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.” And when the child isn’t being so lovely, oooh – naptime and bedtime can’t come soon enough! However, even when my kids have been driving me crazy, it’s amazing how precious it is to rock them to sleep and hold them close to you and study their sweet faces.

Of course, Elijah’s a bit too big to rock anymore, but he still melts my heart when I go in to check on him before I go to bed each night. Both he and Josiah usually require an adjustment of their blankets here or a tucking in there, with Josiah sometimes needing to be completely rearranged so he doesn’t fall off his bed (how he moves so much without being awake is rather puzzling). Those last-minute checks, with a whispered little prayer over them, are the perfect way to end even the hardest days.

 

There are many other little moments that I could mention (When Josiah takes my hand tightly to walk beside me; when Elijah’s sense of humor shines through, and he makes a really witty comment; the boys’ faces when they accomplish something they didn’t think they could, when they are loving and sweet to each other; listening to my boys when they pray and watching their personal relationship with and faith in God grow). I generally get to experience those each and every day with my children.

When I take the time to notice and appreciate those many special moments, how can any day be all that bad?
 WHAT EVERYDAY MOMENTS WITH YOUR CHILDREN ENCOURAGE YOU AS A MOM OR DAD?

 

 

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