Category - Family

Planning for the New Year

December 27, 2015

This post contains an affiliate link, which means that at no additional cost to you, I may receive a small commission if you use the link.

With all the hustle and bustle and excitement of Christmas fading away, suddenly here we are, facing a brand new year. Am I the only one who feels as though it was JUST January 2015?

This year for Christmas, my hubby got me a beautiful Homemaker’s Friend Daily Planner by Sue Hooley, thanks to a terrific offer during The Humbled Homemaker’s Christmas Giveaway. While some people might not appreciate such a gift, for me it is truly exciting.

I like to have a plan. I like to be prepared and know what I need to do and when I need to do it. I always have. When I worked as an executive assistant, I loved my stickie notes and calendar. They kept me organized and focused.

Now as a stay-at-home mom, even some basic planning saves my sanity. My mind is so busy with just keeping up with my little boys that my notes, lists, and schedules are essential to me. They help me remember all the other things I need to do or would like to do in a day, even on the days I don’t get around to actually doing any of the things on my to-do list. Life with children means constantly readjusting your plans to see to their needs and often getting distracted in the middle of a project and maybe not getting back to it until hours or days later. Having it written down helps remind me of what I didn’t get to finish. (Haha…but true.)

Filling in my brand-new 2016 yearly, monthly, and weekly calendars in the planner with birthdays, anniversaries, and yearly events made me smile, not only because I was getting a little organized but also because it gave me a way to look back over this past year and see God’s faithfulness to us throughout all of 2015.

As I went through each month, I remembered different things that we did, and I was able to rejoice over the many prayers answered, all the wonderful memories made, and the struggles faced and overcome through God’s strength.

Some of our personal highlights from 2015:

Brad took a promotion at work and has spent a good portion of the past year working on a huge project that he recently finalized with great success (although he always sees room to continue tweaking and improving it).

I took a leap of faith and launched my blog, feeling completely overwhelmed and out-of-my-league and having no clue what I was doing. However, I followed God’s direction, and I now love sharing with you all. I have learned new things nearly every day about how to improve my blog, have been able to develop a fairly regular posting schedule (although my writing scheduling still needs some refining), and even completed the Write 31 Days challenge in October without losing my sanity completely (hugely thanks to my fabulous hubby’s support and help and God’s leading). I’ve also found a community of other moms and bloggers who encourage and challenge me in not only my writing, but in my walk with God and in my role as wife and mother.

Elijah started kindergarten and is thriving! (Mommy has adjusted and is okay, too.) He may not love getting up every day, but he adores his teacher and his growing knowledge, especially being able to read.

Josiah’s triumph this year is finally getting out of diapers! While he may still have an accident occasionally, he is ready to completely transition from pull-ups to underwear 24/7. I’m not sure who’s happier – him or us! (And if you think this was accomplished without much prayer and God’s help, you’ve obviously never potty-trained a stubborn 2-year-old.)

Brad and I have been able to serve in our church through various ministry opportunities in 2015, and we are looking forward to even more ways to be a part in this next year. I’m also brainstorming ideas for how to activate Elijah’s faith more so that he can begin to develop his gifts and talents to serve others and bless the Lord.

In our family, we have gained a nephew and great-niece who will celebrate their first birthdays in 2016, and we have a wedding coming up in June to celebrate the marriage of our very dear friend who is actually more like family.

Of course, the past year has also brought us some less-than-wonderful times, too, including sickness, difficulties, and loss. Those aren’t as fun to list out. However, even in looking back over those, I can still rejoice because I can see how God has been with us through each and every day, even the hardest ones.

Especially the hardest ones.

No matter what we dealt with, joy or heartache, He proved Himself faithful every step of the way.

So as I am planning ahead and preparing to enter this next year with all its possibilities, expectations, and uncertainties, I can do so in confidence that whatever it brings and whatever we accomplish, He goes before us and walks beside us through it all.

It’s not something I have to write in my planner, though, because it’s something He’s already written on my heart.

Psalm 28:7 – “The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song I will praise Him.”

Why You Can’t Give Jesus a Dinosaur

December 17, 2015

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Christmas According to My Boys

Elijah was only six months old for his first Christmas, so it wasn’t until the following year, when he was a year-and-a-half, that he really began to “get” Christmas. That was the year Brad and I really started to experience the holiday in a new way. Seeing Christmas through my children’s eyes is a wonderful, joyous, and sometimes hilarious thing.

I thought it would be fun if I sat down with my boys and asked them some questions about Christmas. Here are some of my favorite parts of our conversations. I videoed them and typed their answers verbatim, so you can get a glimpse into how delightful and blessed my holidays are with them.

CHRISTMAS ACCORDING TO ELIJAH (5 Years Old)

Tell me about Christmas:

Elijah: It’s one of my favorite days…it is a very good time, and I love it because it is Jesus’s birthday. That’s when people give, and that’s kind of like being God’s servant, sometimes. (Giving is like being God’s servant. Amen!) Why it’s my favorite is because it’s when Jesus was born, and it’s his birthday. And because I like birthdays, probably He likes birthdays.

What’s best part of Christmas?

E: Maybe… I don’t know. Probably… I think the best part of Christmas is…I don’t know…there’s lots of things to choose. There’s a lot of them that I’m thinking about…Snow, presents, stockings, AND when we get to eat breakfast because last Christmas Mommy made a really, yummy, yummy breakfast. (I did. Here’s the recipe for French Toast Casserole.)

To whom are you most excited to give their gift?

E: All I’m going to say is “cousins.” Because that’s easier to say than all the names.

What is one way you can give even when you don’t have money?

E: A hug. Maybe write them a letter. That’s all I can think of.

How can you help people have a good Christmas if you don’t know them?

E: Just say, “hello.” Be kind.

Why do we celebrate Christmas?

E: Because it’s Jesus’s birthday.

Can you tell me about Jesus’s birthday, and what happened?

E: Well, I don’t know what Mary was doing, but she was probably doing something, and then an angel just appeared. Like magic sometimes. Then she had to go to Joseph, and they were going to marry each other because she was going to have a baby. Then they traveled on a donkey, and they had a long journey. And probably on Christmas they had their baby…but, yeah, on Christmas they had the baby. And then the angel came to shepherds and said, “Good news. There is a baby in a stable that has been born.” And there was a star on top, and probably the angel was watching.

After the angel came and told the shepherds, the shepherds went to the stable. And then they saw the baby. And then a long time ago, probably past (he means a while later), like 2 years, like Mommy said, these guys on camels, these kings brought presents for the baby. Silver, is that one?

Me: Gold

E: Gold? *Pause…*

Me: Frankincense

E: (Smiling) Frankincense and myrrh.

What was so special about the baby?

E: That He was God’s Son, and He can create anything He wanted.

Why did God send His Son? Why did Jesus have to come?

E: To die for us.

CHRISTMAS ACCORDING TO JOSIAH (2-1/2 Years Old)

Josiah had watched me ask Elijah questions, so he was ready with his answers before I even had a chance to ask them.

Josiah: Mommy, I want to buy present for Grandpa and Grandma and Grandpa Rowland, and Daddy and Vinny. A bone – a character one, like has scrubby one. (I have no idea what “has scrubby one” means)

Tell me about Jesus:

J: Jesus loved to buy a present, too. (Hahaha. But, hey, Jesus is the best gift, so he’s close.)

Do you remember the story of Jesus?

J: Jesus died on the cross, like this (makes a cross with his fingers).

Why did Jesus die on the cross?

J: Because He keep us safe.

We talked about the story of baby Jesus, too.

J: Mary had the baby.

Who came to see the baby?

J: The camels. The angels and the horsey. And the cow.

What do we do at Christmas?

J: We give presents. And buy one for Jeremiah. (I LOVE that he said GIVE instead of GET) I like to buy a present for Grandpa. A toy present. A hippo. (For Grandpa) And a dinosaur.

Me: For who?

J: Jesus

Elijah jumped in here: Jesus already made the dinosaurs. He already has a dinosaur.

There you go. Christmas as explained by my two precious boys: Giving is like being God’s servant, baby Jesus was visited by “these guys on camels” and all the animals in the barn, Jesus came to die for us, Jesus died for us to keep us safe, and you can’t give Jesus a dinosaur. He already has one.

What fun, sweet, or profound things have your children said about Christmas?

Why These 7 Christmas Songs Are Special to Me

December 15, 2015

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Life in Lape Haven: Why These 7 Christmas Songs Are Special to Me. Seven holiday songs and Christmas carols that bring back great memories of past Christmases.

This post contains an affiliate link, which means that at no extra cost to you, I may receive a small commission if you use the link.

Of all the holidays on our calendar, no other day has as many songs about it as Christmas does. From Christmas carols to holiday classics to brand new songs released every year (who HASN’T done a Christmas album?), you can fill December entirely with songs all about Jesus, winter, Santa, and general “Christmasness.”

As I began thinking about all things Christmas earlier this month, I realized that I have a lot of truly wonderful and precious memories tied to specific Christmas songs. Stop and think about it. I bet you do, too.

Just for fun, and for a few sentimental smiles, I’ve compiled a list, in no particular order, of memory-rich Christmas songs and why they mean so much to me.

#1. O Holy Night: When I was younger, my mom was given a musical Christmas decoration of an angel kneeling at the manger, a little baby Jesus resting on the hay. When you wind it up, it plays “O Holy Night.”

Not only was it one of “Mom’s special decorations” in my mind, the song itself is beautiful. Several years later, I would sing it with our high school choir, kneeling for the entire song – all the verses – holding a lit Christmas candle. In a darkened sanctuary, it was pretty powerful.

But perhaps one of the sweetest links to the song has come in the last couple of years, when Elijah started asking me to sing it to him at bedtime (only one verse). I’m not sure why he latched onto that song in particular, but I’ve sung “O Holy Night” to him countless times, from January through December. It was only just this past month that he even realized that it was supposed to be a “Christmas song.” Since it isn’t the easiest song to sing, there have been nights I’ve felt somewhat self-conscious about my singing, but Elijah’s smile still beams sweetly, happily, no matter how imperfect my voice.

#2. Christmas All Over Again: This song was the very first song on my mom’s “A Very Special Christmas 2” CD. This meant that every year, the day after Thanksgiving, this was usually the first song blaring as we started decorating our house for Christmas, singing, dancing, and laughing all the while. The song is VERY danceable! It’s kind of my “let the Christmas season begin” anthem now.

#3. The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don’t Be Late): Growing up, my brothers and I probably would have picked this as one of our favorite Christmas songs. It’s classic. However, it earned its place on my list when it became part of my annual Christmas-light-viewing tradition with a few of my closest friends.

Every year around the holidays, anytime we were out and about at night (which, since I was generally driving them home from a youth meeting, was at least once a week), I would drive us around to see Christmas lights in the neighborhood. Our soundtrack for the ride was my Billboard’s Family Christmas Classics, which included “The Chipmunk Song.” As part of the festive fun, we always sang along, but one night one friend decided to be stubborn. She wouldn’t sing a word. So, I kept replaying the song until we finally got her to sing at least “Me, I want a hula-hoop!” and my night was made, along with a memory that is still silly and precious to me. I can’t hear that song without thinking of them.

Here’s an official lyric video, so you can follow the bouncing ball and sing along! (This is for you, Amanda!)

#4. Hark! The Herald Angel Sing: Believe it or not, this was the first Christmas song that Elijah learned at least a verse of. Sure he knew parts of “Frosty the Snowman” after multiple out-of-season viewings of that Christmas cartoon, but it was repeatedly watching “A Charlie Brown Christmas” at two-years-old that taught him “Hark! The Herald Angel Sings.” Not only did he like the cartoon, he also had a Charlie Brown book with the story, and at the end, they all sing the carol. We all had to each time as well. Elijah even sang it for his Grandma Lape as part of her Christmas gift that year.

#5. The Little Drummer Boy: Okay, this one’s kind of mean, but I can’t help it that that’s how the memory was made. Haha.

When I was a young teenager, we were up at my paternal grandma’s for Christmas and went to her church’s Christmas service. As part of the program, an older lady with rather unnaturally bright red hair and a red dress (yes, she reminded me of a much older “Annie”) sang this very song. She stood still and stiff for the most part and was sooo serious as she sang her “pa-rrrrrrum-pum-pum-pums,” rolling her “R’s” excessively and shaking her head along with her vibrato that I couldn’t help but giggle. (And giggling in church is dangerous because when you aren’t supposed to laugh or giggle, it’s even harder to stop.) I wasn’t the only one who got tickled, though, so I didn’t feel as badly. That lady forever changed that song for me. 🙂

#6. The Twelve Days of Christmas: In the middle of December 1999, my entire immediate family moved from Georgia back up to Ohio. My sister’s family and my dad had already headed north a week or so earlier, with my oldest brother returning back to Georgia after an issue with one of the vehicles. My mom and I had waited for my youngest brother to finish his semester at school, so when we finally pulled out of the driveway, we each were driving one of the four cars in our little caravan making the 13-hour drive.

Since this was back before everyone had cell phones, we couldn’t communicate much with each other while we were driving, but when we had a rest stop, I remember my mom telling us what radio station she was listening to because she’d found one that was playing Christmas songs.

Once we were back on our way, one car following the other, “The Twelve Days of Christmas” came on. To show that we were hearing the same thing, Mom and I counted off the number for each of the twelve days’ items, using one hand, holding it up so that we could each see the other person’s through the back window or rearview mirror. (Eleven and twelve were a bit trickier.) It was how we sang along together while we were all in different cars.

#7. Emmanuel: Written by my father, who is a published singer/songwriter, this is a very special Christmas song. I wish I had a recording uploaded to share with you because telling you about won’t really do it justice.

However, from the time he wrote the song (back when I was much younger), I always looked forward to him ministering with it at Christmas time at church. No matter how many times I’ve heard it, it’s still powerful. Below are the lyrics, at least. (Copyright Jerry Holman)

Long ago and far away

In a place that far from here

A Babe was born into the night

He knew creation, He hung the stars

But the love He had for man

Compelled Him to leave His paradise.

He became Emmanuel, God with Us.

Emmanuel, God Most High

Unashamed He left His throne

Taking on the form of man

And He became, and He is, Emmanuel.

Then came the time as it was told

By the prophets of old

For Him to bleed and die upon the tree

He was spotless, without sin

Neither was guile found in His mouth

But He gave His life so we might go Free.

He became Emmanuel, God with Us.

Emmanuel, God Most High

Unashamed He left His throne

Taking on the form of man

And He became, and He is, Emmanuel.

As always, there are more I could add. “Sleigh Ride” is my mother’s favorite, and “Wonderful Christmastime” is my mother-in-law’s most hated, so we tease her with it. “The Christmas Song” was my paternal grandpa’s favorite, and I can’t help but think of him when I hear it.

So many songs throughout this month bring back thoughts of Christmases past, and as we’re listening to and singing them with our boys, I know we’re making new memories that we’ll cherish for many Christmases to come.

Do you have a special Christmas memory linked to a Christmas song?

My Favorite Christmas Movies & A GIVEAWAY!

December 14, 2015

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With Christmas less than two weeks away, it’s time to really embrace the season by watching all my favorite Christmas movies and television specials and singing along to Christmas carols and fun holiday songs all day.

Sure I’ve already caught a couple of films and shows, and we have had Christmas music playing off and on since the day after Thanksgiving, but I think that everyone generally has a few very special movies and songs that they just have to enjoy every year. This week, I’m going to be sharing my lists with you, and as part of the fun, I’m also going to be doing a GIVEAWAY! (More on that in a bit)

There is nothing like a few good Christmas movies to get you ready to celebrate the holiday. Cuddled on the couch with your family, sipping hot chocolate, and munching on Christmas cookies while you all laugh, sing, or even tear up thanks to a film you’ve probably seen so many times you can quote it by heart. It doesn’t matter. Favorite Christmas movies never get old or lose their charm.

For me, I have a huge list of holiday features that I appreciate, but there are 9 movies that I have to make time for each Christmas, in order from “Really Want to See It” to “Absolutely MUST SEE It.” (I’ve included an affiliate link to each movie, which means at no additional cost to you, I may receive a small commission when you use the link.)

MY 9 FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MOVIES

#9. Meet Me in St. Louis

1944, MGM Musical/Romantic Comedy. Judy Garland, turn-of-the-century costumes, a delightful cast, entertaining storyline, and catchy music make this such a fun film any time of the year because the movie doesn’t just take place at Christmas. The story follows the lives of the Smith family over the course of the year leading up to the 1904 World’s Fair in St. Louis. However, a lot of the best stuff in the show happens during the climatic Christmas Eve scenes, including Judy singing the iconic “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” to her on-screen little sister, Margaret O’Brien.

My favorite part: Either the after-the-party scene where Judy Garland has the “boy next door” help her turn out the lights in the house, or the Christmas Eve ball, including the conversation between the two older girls as they get ready for the evening. Oh, and the early-dinner-scheming in the beginning of the film.

#8. The Preacher’s Wife

1996, Romantic Comedy. Denzel Washington & Whitney Houston star in this remake of the classic Carey Grant Christmas movie, The Bishop’s Wife. While I like both versions of the movie, the music in The Preacher’s Wife makes the newer film my pick. (Sorry, Carey.) Denzel is an angel named Dudley, who is sent to help a busy, giving preacher, a preacher who is so focused on his work for God that he tends to overlook his family. However, Dudley’s arrival seems to cause even more trouble for the minister.

My favorite part: The children’s Christmas program is adorable, and when Dudley “fixes” the preacher’s little boy’s firetruck.

#7. Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas

2000, Comedy. The live-action adaptation of Dr. Seuss’ book and the 1966 cartoon is always fun. While other adaptations of Seuss classics have gone horribly awry (ugh…The Cat in the Hat!), this one is pretty perfect. I love how fully they embraced all things Seussical and Who, and Jim Carey plays a good, mean Grinch. Watching this with my boys makes it even better.

My favorite part: Spoiler alert – When his heart changes, of course, and he returns Christmas! Also, when he tries to sing along with the Whos as they celebrate around their Whoville Christmas tree. “Fah Who Foraze, Dah Who Doraze” is just fun to say.

#6. While You Were Sleeping

1995, Romantic Comedy. If you’ve never seen this one, you have to. Sandra Bullock plays Lucy, a lonely girl who is smitten with a handsome stranger who passes her tollbooth every day. When she jumps on the tracks to save him after he’s mugged and fallen in to a coma, his family mistakes her for his fiancée. Only one person doesn’t believe the story, his charming brother (Bill Pullman), who is determined to find out just who Lucy is.

My favorite part: Oh, there are sooo many great scenes and endlessly fun quotables. This is a movie that my mom and I try to see together every year, and it’s always just as funny. One of our favorite scenes is the one around the dinner table with all of his family talking about the mashed potatoes and John Wayne. Watch the movie, and you’ll understand.

#5. Elf

2004, Comedy. Do I seriously need to write a description for this one? Will Ferrell is Buddy, a human who grew up as an elf. Once he realizes this, he goes to New York to meet his father, who has managed to wind up on Santa’s naughty list. Hilarious, heart-warming, and joyful. One of the best family Christmas movies!

My favorite part: The quotes. All the funny quotes. Oh, the initial meeting between Buddy and his dad with the impromptu “Christmas-gram”and when Buddy decorates the toy department. Or discovers the mailroom. And when he takes Jovie (Zooey Deschanel) on a date. “Francisco….

#4. The Nativity Story

2004, Biblical Drama. This is a beautiful depiction of the story of Mary, Joseph, and the birth of Jesus. While I’m still a bit amused at how easily Mary actually delivers her baby (seriously, I’m pretty sure Mary had to work a little bit for it) and annoyed by the fact that the wise men show up so early (they would have been a year or more later in arriving), I love this movie. It shows the real emotions, humor, and struggles that Mary, Joseph, their families, and friends may have dealt with. It’s so easy for us to forget that these people actually lived – they aren’t just characters in a story. Seeing their humanity brings the Christmas story that much closer to home, stirring my heart to the awesomeness of Jesus as Immanuel, God with Us.

My favorite part: I love Joseph. Seriously, he’s my favorite character. Mary and Joseph’s journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem and their journey to caring for each other. Also, the comedic side of the wise men is pretty great.

#3. White Christmas

1954, Musical Romantic Comedy. You had to guess that this one made my list. It’s one of the all-time greatest Christmas movies. Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, tons of singing and dancing, and Christmas! The story is about two army buddies who come to the aid of their former commanding officer by putting on a Christmas show at his Vermont lodge. With the aid (and adoration) of a sister act, all they need is a little snow to make it perfect.

My favorite part: Can I first share my least favorite? Vera-Ellen. She drives me crazy throughout the whole movie because she’s constantly looking at the camera, especially during dance routines, and it’s just weird. I mentioned this once to a friend, and she said now that she’d noticed it, it was bothersome. So, sorry if this changes the movie for you.

Okay, the good parts – the banter between Bing and Danny and the songs and dances. Obviously.

#2. The Shop Around the Corner

1940, Romantic Comedy. Hello, Jimmy Stewart! He is one of my classic Hollywood favorites (I mean, he’s just great, isn’t he?). In this film, Jimmy is a head sales clerk at a small store, and he’s corresponding with a girl that he’s never met. Meanwhile, a new sales girl (Margaret Sullavan) is hired on at the store right around the Christmas season, and she and Jimmy Stewart’s characters do not particularly care for each other…or do they? 🙂

If you recognize some of the plot, it may be because this movie was remade twice: once as In the Good Old Summertime with Judy Garland (I like this one, too) and more recently as You’ve Got Mail (Tom Hanks & Meg Ryan – I don’t like this one).

My favorite part: When Jimmy Stewart’s character finds out the identity of the girl he’s writing. Watching him interact with her from then on is funny and sweet and swoon-worthy all at the same time.

#1. It’s a Wonderful Life

1946, Drama/Comedy. There really isn’t another Christmas movie that captures it all for me like this one does. Humor, music, struggle, faith, and hope. Jimmy Stewart as George Bailey is perfect. In the move (if for some sad reason you’ve never seen it), George, in desperation, wishes he’d never been born and miraculously gets the chance to see just what the world would be like without him.

My favorite part: Walking Mary (Donna Reed) home from the dance – “What is it you want, Mary?” and “This is a very interesting situation.” His stand against Potter. When he meets Clarence – “Well, you look about the kind of angel I’d get.” His joy as he runs through the town, shouting, “Merry Christmas,” to everyone and everything just because he’s happy to be alive. And of course, the end, where all of his giving and sacrifice are rewarded.

I also have an Honorable Mention list or an “If I can fit them in” list, which includes Miracle on 34^th Street, In the Good Old Summertime, Bachelor Mother, Little Women (1994 version is my favorite), National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (Brad has an edited, more family-friendly version), The Nutcracker, Holiday Inn, Home Alone, & A Christmas Story.

I realize that everyone’s list is different, and I might not have mentioned your number one “Absolutely MUST SEE It.” Sorry. As I said before, I like a lot of Christmas movies. But they can’t all be my favorites. 🙂

Speaking of favorites, this week one holly jolly reader will win one of my “Absolutely MUST SEE It” favorite Christmas movies along with three more holiday films.

My special Christmas giveaway

is a TCM Greatest Classic Films Collection: Holiday, a 2-disc set which includes my #2 favorite – A Shop Around the Corner – as well as three more Christmas movies: the beloved Christmas in Connecticut, the 1938 version of A Christmas Carol, and the cute It Happened on 5^th Avenue. Along with the movies, the prize pack includes a selection of Land O Lakes Hot Chocolate in a variety of flavors. My boys enjoyed helping me taste-test the different options, so they could pick their favorites.

: TCM Greatest Classic Films Collection: Holiday

: A selection of Land O Lakes Hot Chocolate

The giveaway starts today and is open until Thursday 11:59pm, with the winner being announced on Friday.

So, did your favorite Christmas movies make my list? What would be your #1 MUST SEE Holiday film?

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Why We Don’t Need More This Christmas

December 11, 2015

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Life in Lape Haven: Why We Don't Need More This Christmas. Encouragement from Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World by Kristen Welch is helping us stay determined to give our children more at Christmas by giving them less.

This year, Brad and I really felt strongly that we needed to set some guidelines for our family’s Christmas and limit the number of presents we give our children and each other. While limiting our list will help us stay within a better budget for the holidays, the main motivation behind scaling back is that we don’t want our children to think that Christmas is all about presents and/or all about them.

We’ve never gone crazy with the gift buying, and we generally request non-toy items for our boys (clothes, books, art & craft supplies), and yet we still have a home with more than enough toys, trinkets, and random stuff. The boys’ rooms are overflowing with under-used and under-appreciated toys, and the boys themselves get easily overwhelmed when it’s time to clean up the disasters they create just by digging through the toy box.

We have slowly begun a process of weeding out the items they no longer play with or don’t need in an effort to eliminate clutter and excess. We have made some progress… just in time to look square in the eyes of the biggest gift-giving day of the year.

When other parents have talked to us about Christmas plans, we have received mixed reactions to our “minimalist” Christmas ideas. I know we aren’t the only parents who limit the number of gifts. In fact, I’ve seen the idea on Pinterest several times over the past few years (“Something they want, something they need, something to wear, & something to read”), and I know other families following the same or similar guidelines.

But sadly, in the culture we live in, NOT striving for a “get as much as you can” Christmas is baffling to many people, even Christians.

That’s why I was so excited to be selected to be on the launch team for Kristen Welch’s newest book, Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World. Just having read a summary of the book and from following her blog, We are THAT Family, I knew that here was someone who would back us up in our fight to keep Christmas (and life) focused on Jesus and others.

Before I was even through the introduction, I was encouraged and more determined than ever to stick with our simplified Christmas plan.

In her book, Kristen shares her experiences and advice in parenting upstream against a culture of entitlement, not giving our kids everything they want, and making sure they understand the true difference between “want” and “need,” so that we can raise children who are hardworking, content, and grateful.

Having been raised by parents who often reminded me that they were “not here to make you happy, but to grow you up,” I had a good foundation laid to help me raise my boys to be appreciative, but even with that, the farther I’ve read into her book, the more I see areas where entitlement has sneaked into our home.

Or maybe we’ve left the door cracked open, as Kristen is quick to point out with this nice heart-checking challenge,

“Entitlement didn’t start with my kids. It began with me. I entitled them because I was entitled.”

Hmmm. And ouch.

So, Brad and I are having a fun time of examining ourselves and re-evaluating how we reflect gratitude in our own lives. (Oh, yes, hubby is getting this message right along with me, as I share ideas and stories from Kristen’s book.) Are we complaining about what we don’t have, or are we content and thankful for all our blessings? Shining a light on the issue is revealing some behaviors and attitudes in us that are kind of surprising and challenging. Recognizing it for what it is, though, allows us to deal with it and change.

Our kids learn from us, our attitudes, and what we allow. Something I’ve told my husband from Elijah’s very first Christmas is that our children will expect whatever we teach them to expect. If we make Christmas all about presents, they’ll expect it to be all about presents.

It’s up to us as the parents to set the limits.

In Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World, Kristen reminds us,

“Kids will be kids, and if we give them too much, too soon, they will likely take it.”

This works in every area of their lives. If we allow our children to rule the roost because we don’t want to make them unhappy with discipline or telling them “no,” then that is exactly what they will expect. While they truly crave boundaries and discipline to feel loved and secure, few children are going to ask you outright to set those rules or inforce them.

Most will just keep taking and want more.

Another quote that I love from Kristen takes on this demand of entitlement for more:

“’This is all I get. There’s nothing else?’

From ice cream serving sizes to allowances, the opportunity to demand more is present.

‘Is that all?’…We as parents have to examine the question for ourselves, so we can say to our children with conviction, ‘Yes, that is all. We don’t need more.’”

This Christmas we are setting limits because we know that we don’t need more, and so far, our children are fine with it. They are still young so the expectations for an extravagant Christmas haven’t cemented in them yet.

That’s another reason for us to start NOW with keeping our guard up against entitlement. While it isn’t impossible to teach and direct them when they are a little older, it’s much easier to begin on the right foot from the get-go.

And if the world thinks that we’re strange, so be it.

Kristen’s words from the introduction are an encouraging reminder to stay the course:

“It’s in our human makeup to want to fit in, to not stick out or be different, to blend in. The problem is, we are called to exactly that – to go against the flow.”

For Christmas this means celebrating Jesus more, giving to others in need more, and realizing that for us, less really is more.

UPDATE: How did our four-gift Christmas go? Here’s our experience.

If you’d like to read the first chapter of Kristen’s book, you can find it here on the Tyndale House site.

5 of My Favorite Christmas Goodies Recipes

December 8, 2015

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5 of My Favorite Christmas Goodies Recipes, Life in Lape Haven. From our family Christmas cookie exchange, some of my favorite Christmas cookie and treats recipes, including homemade Marshmallows and Gingerbread.

Straight on the heels of telling you that you don’t have to do everything to have a great Christmas, I’m breaking out a list of five of my favorite Christmas goodies recipes to tempt you into making time to try them out. 🙂

Baking Christmas cookies and treats is on our family’s list of must-do traditions. Every year I get together with the ladies in my family (both sides, moms and sisters, whoever can make it), and our children to bake and decorate cookies and goodies. We spend the afternoon in cutesy aprons, taking over one of our kitchens, covering the table and counters with sugar cookies, gingerbread men, and whatever other yummies we’ve brought to make and share.

It’s much easier to keep my sanity during cookie decorating with my excited boys when I have the back-up of a Grandma or two and a couple aunts. 🙂 I love my boys, but Elijah’s stubborn independence and creativity and Josiah’s two-year-old curiosity (and climbing) can really test my reflexes and patience, especially in the kitchen when they are “helping.”

: Cousins decorating cookies together.

: Letting Grandma help him decorate.

: Not wanting Grandma to help him.

By the end of the day, we’ve all laughed, shared good conversation, and sung along with some Christmas music, as we’ve made memories and enough Christmas treats to fill a platter for us each to take home.

So, from our great times of baking and bonding, here are five of my favorite recipes for Christmas cookie and goodies exchanges.

(This post contains an Amazon affiliate link, which means that at no additional cost to you, I may receive a small commission if you use the link.)

ROLO TURTLES

For such an easy, EASY treat, these little guys are deliciously addicting.

All you need are 3 ingredients: pretzels, Rolos, and pecans. Stick some pretzels on a cookie sheet, top them each with a Rolo, pop them in the oven to soften, finish them with a pecan, and you’re done.

(Salty + Sweet + Creamy) + (Crunchy + Gooey) = Awesomeness.

Rolo Turtles Recipe

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE DOUGH TRUFFLES

These started out as something special to make for my husband. If you scroll through my collection of recipes on Pinterest, you’ll see that I’ve pinned quite a few chocolate chip cookie dough recipes because my hubby loves cookie dough.

However, these quickly became a family favorite (as soon as we made the first batch!).

They are pretty easy, but it does take some time to roll them into the balls and dip/cover them in chocolate. I’ve yet to get the hang of making them really pretty when I dip them in the chocolate, but they taste good no matter what they look like. Haha.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Truffles Recipe

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday: 5 of My Favorite Christmas Goodies Recipes. From our family Christmas cookie exchange, some of my favorite Christmas cookie and treats recipes, including homemade Marshmallows and Gingerbread.

At the top of the picture, you can see the wrapped caramels.

CARAMELS

These are so yummy, but what else do you expect from something made of basically just butter and sugar. Yeah, these don’t even pretend to be healthy at all.

The first year we made these, we were unprepared for how tasty they were and how long it would take to roll every little piece of caramel up in wax paper. This batch goes on forever because you don’t need big pieces (remember – just butter and sugar)! We split it up between everyone and still had some to freeze.

Caramels Recipe

GINGERBREAD COOKIES

We never really did gingerbread cookies much when I was growing up, and from what I had of other gingerbread cookies, I didn’t mind not having them. However, when I found this recipe, it changed everything.

I love this gingerbread recipe, and both of my boys have loved it, too. In fact, it was Josiah’s favorite of all the cookies during his first Christmas.

I leave the cloves out of the recipe, mostly because I don’t usually have cloves on hand, but other than that I follow the recipe. The dough is a sticky one, so you definitely want to chill or freeze it before you cut out your shapes.

Gingerbread Cookie Recipe

My sticky-faced helper after we made marshmallows for the first time.

MARSHMALLOWS

Yes, homemade marshmallows. These have made me famous…well, in my family and with a few people at my church. When you taste them, you may join my fan club.

Now, don’t be afraid. They are actually a lot easier than you think and so much more delicious than what you might think based on store-bought ones.

My love for homemade marshmallows can be traced directly to Alton Brown and his episode of Good Eats, “Puff the Magic Mallow,” which was all about marshmallows.

I watched him make marshmallows, then promptly added gelatin to my shopping list. Having loved marshmallows since I was very little, I had to try this.

Now this recipe does call for using a stand mixer (I love my KitchenAid). I guess you could use a hand mixer, but since you have to whip the sugar syrup for at least 13 minutes, it’s rather convenient to be able to let the mixer work without you. (Plus, it’s always dangerous to have little ones running around free while you are occupied and stuck in one spot for that long.)

Homemade Marshmallow Recipe and Tutorial Video

: Last year Elijah did most of the Rolo Turtle assembling.

: Waiting for the cookies to bake.

There you go, five of my favorite Christmas cookies and treats recipes. By the way, if you find you have leftovers, or if you just want to pace yourself with all the sugar intake, you’ll find that the cookie dough truffles, the Rolo turtles, and the caramels all freeze nicely. The gingerbread has never lasted long enough for us to test it out in the freezer, and I would say that the marshmallows need to be used within a couple of weeks. If you’ve not devoured the marshmallows by then or amped up your hot chocolate with a few, you should definitely use them to make Rice Krispies Treats. Oh, talk about deliciousness (That might be a sixth favorite recipe there).

As always, let me know if you try any of these, and tell me what you think about them.

What is your favorite Christmas goodies recipe? Share it in the comments so I can add something new to my list!

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