Life in Lape Haven

Author - Kishona

The Year Mother’s Day Changed for Me

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

It was Mother’s Day Sunday in 2010, and I was about 4 weeks from Elijah’s due date (although he would be born in just 3 weeks). My little guy was doing ninja kicks and flips in my belly throughout the service at church, making it hard to concentrate on much besides him.

Then came the moment they acknowledged mothers throughout the congregation, and the usher passed out a small gift to each mommy present.

When I was bypassed, one of the older moms reminded him, “You forgot Kishona.”

His reply, “Well, she’s not really a mother yet.”

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

I was a little surprised, a little embarrassed, and yes, a little hurt. My child was right there, with me, pressing on my ribs as I glanced at my husband, unsure of what to say. I didn’t really care about the little trinket, but to be told that I didn’t qualify as a mother when I very much so felt like one already…

I didn’t have to say anything, though, because the other mothers around me immediately came to my defense. They understood that being a mother doesn’t just start when the baby is placed in your arms.

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

For me, in my heart, I was a mother the moment I saw those two pink lines on the pregnancy test. That was the moment everything I did became about that little one I was carrying – how I ate, what I did, even forcing myself to rest.

For eight months, I had put up with nausea, horrible dysgeusia (constant disgusting taste in my mouth), heartburn, restless nights, and more recently, random people wanting to touch my belly. I had prayed over this baby, sung to him, and talked to him all the time. He responded to my voice and touch. I already knew a bit of his personality and could tell he was going to be a stubborn one just by how he reacted with kicks whenever I would roll over to my left side at night.

So, to be told that I wasn’t “really” a mom yet was kind of upsetting.

I totally understood that I had not had all of the “mom” experiences yet, but you’re not a mom based on your experiences or how old your children are or how many you have. All that might make you a more prepared or wiser mom, but being a mother is based on the love you have for your child.

Sadly, I was not the only mama overlooked that day. And while I was defended by the older moms, this mama was not.

Because she didn’t have a pregnant belly or a toddler in the nursery or a child by her side. Few knew that she had miscarried a little boy the year before. She and her husband were newer in the church, and even so, some women never share that deeply personal and heartbreaking struggle and grief.

I didn’t realize it until after service when I overheard her husband comforting her.

And my heart broke.

Suddenly, I saw Mother’s Day as I hadn’t ever before. Not just as a joyful celebration of my wonderful mother and grandmothers and all my hopes of being a good mom, too, but as potentially the most difficult day of the year for those unacknowledged mothers and those longing to be mommies, quietly hurting in the background.

It made the day more precious to me because it was suddenly tinged with bittersweetness. When you have something so beautiful and cherished, you want that for everyone.

Now every Mother’s Day, as I celebrate with my husband, our families, and our little boys, I can’t help but think about and pray for those women who are grieving through infertility, miscarriages, and loss, acknowledging them and defending their place in the ranks of motherhood.

As moms and even those praying to be a mom, the hopes and love we have for our children bond us in a unique way and give us a unique opportunity to support and encourage each other in our mothering journey. We may not have the same experiences and struggles, and it might seem unfairly easy or difficult for some compared to others. However, who better to come alongside us than another woman who shares our central desire of being the mothers God wants us to be.

Life in Lape Haven: The Year Mother's Day Changed for Me. Few holidays can be as emotional as Mother's Day, with joy, heartache, and frustration all coming together as we celebrate the journey of motherhood. No matter her story, every mom deserves to be acknowledged, encouraged, and supported, especially on Mother's Day.

This Sunday, pray for mothers – all of them: the exhausted moms, the new moms who feel overwhelmed, the moms grieving the children they’ve never held or will never hold again, the moms missing their own mothers, the expectant moms, the single moms, the moms-still-waiting-to-be, and even the moms enjoying the day with their families. They all need your prayers, encouragement, and acknowledgement.

Happy Mother’s Day.

 

“Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.” – Ricki Lake


 

Get more ideas & encouragement from this real-life mom as I experience God’s faithfulness through the joy and chaos of motherhood.

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YOU MAY ALSO LIKE:

5 Everyday Moments that Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It

On Having a Second Child: the Amazing Multiplication of Love

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3  Things I Know About Becoming a Mother

Tried It Tuesday: Easy Beef Stroganoff

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday: Easy Beef Stroganoff. This quick, easy recipe for Beef Stroganoff has become a favorite of my whole family. Plus you can make the sauce ahead & freeze it to make an extra fast, tasty dinner.

Earlier this year, I was looking for something new to make for dinner. Tired of the usual standbys, I went searching for inspiration on Pinterest, and I came across a fairly easy-looking recipe for which I had enough of the ingredients in my pantry or refrigerator that I could try it out.

Knowing that my guys all love pasta, I decided to see how they liked Beef Stroganoff, something that I knew my two little boys had never had. It was a bit of a gamble since they can have their picky-eater moments, but it turned out to be worth the risk because everyone loved it. This quick, tasty dish has since become a regular menu item in our house, one that my boys eat right up.

The recipe I started with is Creamy Beef Stroganoff from Cooking with K, but of course, as usual, I’ve tweaked it based on what I have on hand and our family’s tastes.

This is a really simple, throw-it-together kind of a meal, and according to the original recipe, you can make the sauce (minus the sour cream) and freeze it, which would make it an even quicker dinner if you prepped ahead. I haven’t tried this yet. I do, however, usually buy 3 or more pounds of ground beef, and brown and freeze it in 1-pound portions, so I have that ready to go. (This is great for quick sloppy joes, spaghetti, cheeseburger soup, or even this beef stroganoff.)

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday: Easy Beef Stroganoff. This quick, easy recipe for Beef Stroganoff has become a favorite of my whole family. Plus you can make the sauce ahead & freeze it to make an extra fast, tasty dinner.

Some of the changes I have made to the recipe include using a little less ground beef and onion, not using any green peppers, adding more evaporated milk, and using Greek yogurt instead of sour cream. It’s also nice to jazz it up with fresh mushrooms or heavy cream instead of evaporated milk.

It might not be the prettiest dish, but it is definitely a delicious one. 🙂

Here’s my version of an Easy Beef Stroganoff. Enjoy!

 

5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It

5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It, Life in Lape Haven. Being a parent is hard, and some days are difficult. However, even on the roughest days, there are moments that can remind us of how wonderful it is to be a mom or dad and how precious our children are to us.

As a mom, I know that some days, parenting is just hard. Children can be demanding, cranky, destructive (usually accidentally), disobedient, whiny, messy, and just exhausting. However, I have found that even on those really rough days, there are still moments sprinkled throughout the chaos that remind me that my children are truly gifts from God and being a mom really is worth it.

Here are five of my favorite everyday moments that make being a mother the best calling ever.

5 Everyday Moments That Make Being a Mom Totally Worth It, Life in Lape Haven. Being a parent is hard, and some days are difficult. However, even on the roughest days, there are moments that can remind us of how wonderful it is to be a mom or dad and how precious our children are to us.

1. Cuddles and Snuggles:

My boys are all pretty affectionate little guys, and they love cuddles and snuggles. Whether it’s climbing into bed with Mommy and Daddy on Saturday morning (so much sweeter when they wait until after 8 am!), or just scooting up really close to us on the couch, our boys are cuddlers. They want to be with us.

Josiah likes to sit beside me as I’m typing or editing pictures, laying his little hand on my lower arm and his head against my upper arm, and just watch me. Elijah’s tall enough now that he can almost rest his head on my shoulder. Even the most frustrating days can be softened when they are being sweet and tender like that.

 

2. Giggles:

No matter how bad a day is, my boys will be laughing at some point, those deep-belly giggles that are impossible to resist. They can be fighting and arguing with each other one minute, then laughing with each other the next. And their joy is contagious. Of course, it’s even better when I get to be the one to bring out the giggles in them with silliness and tickles and fun. Laughter is a beautiful remedy for discouragement and exhaustion (I laugh even easier when I’m tired. Haha!) After all, the Bible tell us, “A merry heart does good, like medicine.” (Proverbs 17:22)

 

3. Unexpected Hugs & Kisses:

Having mentioned our boys’ affectionate natures, is it any surprise that I get treated to random hugs and kisses throughout my day? Josiah’s thing is to give me “all the hugs in the world,” which is basically a really tight, prolonged clinging sort of hug. Even though he will have moments when he doesn’t want ME to give HIM hugs or kisses, he loves to surprise me with them.

Elijah, however, has never rejected a hug that I can remember. He’ll give me a “good morning hug,” a hug before and after school, and hugs “just because” throughout the day, but his specialty is his bedtime hug, where he basically lets you think you’re just leaning down for one last kiss before he goes to sleep, and he’ll latch on, both arms around your neck, and keep you there. (And giggle.) He’s surprisingly strong for his age. He’s also the most likely to come up and give Mom random kisses on the cheek.


 

4. “I love you, Mommy”:

I don’t know if there is anything more encouraging or refreshing on a difficult day than when your child looks you in the eyes and sweetly and sincerely tells you, “I love you, Mommy.” Even if they are echoing your words with an “I love you, too,” it has a way of refocusing you to how blessed you are to be the mother of that child (yes, that one, the one who just a few minutes ago flushed his training underwear down the toilet – true story. Or that one, who is so driven to create that he keeps ransacking the kitchen junk drawer and recycle bin, even when he’s been told not to, to “make something,” leaving crazy messes and empty tape dispensers in his wake.)

I also cherish their unique compliments of “You look like a princess, Mommy,” or “I like how your hair feels, Mom.”

 

5. Watching My Babies Sleep:

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.” And when the child isn’t being so lovely, oooh – naptime and bedtime can’t come soon enough! However, even when my kids have been driving me crazy, it’s amazing how precious it is to rock them to sleep and hold them close to you and study their sweet faces.

Of course, Elijah’s a bit too big to rock anymore, but he still melts my heart when I go in to check on him before I go to bed each night. Both he and Josiah usually require an adjustment of their blankets here or a tucking in there, with Josiah sometimes needing to be completely rearranged so he doesn’t fall off his bed (how he moves so much without being awake is rather puzzling). Those last-minute checks, with a whispered little prayer over them, are the perfect way to end even the hardest days.

 

There are many other little moments that I could mention (When Josiah takes my hand tightly to walk beside me; when Elijah’s sense of humor shines through, and he makes a really witty comment; the boys’ faces when they accomplish something they didn’t think they could, when they are loving and sweet to each other; listening to my boys when they pray and watching their personal relationship with and faith in God grow). I generally get to experience those each and every day with my children.

When I take the time to notice and appreciate those many special moments, how can any day be all that bad?
 WHAT EVERYDAY MOMENTS WITH YOUR CHILDREN ENCOURAGE YOU AS A MOM OR DAD?

 

 

Get more ideas & encouragement from this real-life mom as I experience God’s faithfulness through the joy and chaos of motherhood.

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YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE:

3 Things I Know About Becoming a Mother

8 of My Favorite Things About Being Pregnant

Simple Ways to Spark Joy in Your Children

The Last Time He Called Me, “Mommy”

 

Tried It Tuesday: How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes. Two active little boys and spring mean that grass stains are showing up on lots of the clothes in my laundry. I have found a fairly easy way to get grass stains out of their jeans and clothing, without soaking the grass stained garments for hours.

Less than a month ago, I posted about finding a solution for getting grease stains out of my boys’ clothes, and at the end of the blog, since I’ve also shared how I get dry erase marker out of my kindergartener’s jeans and how I found a simple way to remove silly putty from fabric, I said, “I wonder what new stain my little boys will find for me to become an expert on next…”

Well, it didn’t take long. In fact, I actually should have seen this one coming. I mean, I’m a mom of two active, energetic, outdoors-loving little boys.

With spring’s arrival, I should have known it was inevitable.

Bring on the grass stains.

Yep, no sooner had our grass turned from yucky dead brown to bright, newly-sprouted green, than those infamous streaks of green showed up on clothes all through my laundry baskets.

A couple of days after we set up the boys’ new-to-us wooden swing set, I had 5 pairs of grass-stained jeans to tackle.

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes. Two active little boys and spring mean that grass stains are showing up on lots of the clothes in my laundry. I have found a fairly easy way to get grass stains out of their jeans and clothing, without soaking the grass stained garments for hours.

Knowing that I was staring at my summer laundry nemesis that day, I went straight to two sources as I searched for help in heading off this stain epidemic:

Pinterest and my mother.

While I knew Pinterest holds all kinds of solutions for pretty much every household problem ever, I also knew that my mom had dealt with her share of grass stains, thanks to my two busy, athletic brothers, both of whom played football.

Pinterest’s solutions included using rubbing alcohol or hair spray as a solvent on the stain, and a lot of pre-treating, scrubbing, soaking, and rewashing. Hmmm.

Mom’s answer: “For the boys’ football pants, I just used laundry detergent to pre-treat, then scrubbed it well, and washed the clothes in cold water. If it didn’t come out, I washed it again. If it’s white, you can bleach it, also.”

(I imagine that if the clothing were white, you could also set it out in the sun, and let the sun help you bleach it out, too, if you wanted, like you do with cloth diapers.)

Thankfully, I don’t have boys ruining football pants, yet. I just have tumble-bumble boys sliding around the grass on the knees of their jeans. 🙂

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes. Two active little boys and spring mean that grass stains are showing up on lots of the clothes in my laundry. I have found a fairly easy way to get grass stains out of their jeans and clothing, without soaking the grass stained garments for hours.

So, I combined the answers and tried it out on those five pair of jeans, one of which had a grass stain that had *gasp & sigh* ALREADY GONE THROUGH THE DRYER! Ugh.  Like all stains, grass stains are best taken care of as soon as possible!

I didn’t hold out much hope for that rogue pair of pants, but the other four, I could fix them, right?

Step 1

I started out with my new standby solvent – hand sanitizer. It works for the dry erase marker & the silly putty, and some of the solutions I found for grass stains mentioned using alcohol, so I applied some of the gel and rather than scour it with my “cleaning toothbrush,” I used my fingernails to kind of scratch at the stain. I had read that you wanted to lift the stain out. Okay.

Step 2

I sprayed each stain with Spray’N’Wash Pre-treater (you can use try whatever stain treater you have on hand) and scrubbed it in, lightly, with my cleaning toothbrush.

Step 3

Each stain then also received a good dollop of laundry detergent. In my researching, it said to use detergent with enzymes. My detergent doesn’t have enzymes, but I used it anyway. I scrubbed that in.

Step 4

I waited about 30 minutes or so before I washed the garments in cold water. I had some other jeans that needed stain treated for those lovely dry erase marker stains, so that’s what I spent some of my “waiting” time doing. Then I threw all the jeans into the washer.

Step 5

DON’T PUT THEM IN THE DRYER!!!! I looked over the clothing to see if the stains were gone. I let them all air dry until I could really tell if there was any staining left. While they did look better, I wanted them completely stain-free.

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes. Two active little boys and spring mean that grass stains are showing up on lots of the clothes in my laundry. I have found a fairly easy way to get grass stains out of their jeans and clothing, without soaking the grass stained garments for hours.

Step 6

If they aren’t clean enough, you can repeat all the steps over again. Or not. I just used a little more pre-treater and scrubbing, let it sit a few minutes, and washed them again in cold water. This time when they came out, I was happy. All of the pants, except the ones that I had put through the dryer accidentally, came out free of staining. The dried-in pair didn’t come out all the way, but it was much, much better.

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Get Grass Stains Out of Clothes. Two active little boys and spring mean that grass stains are showing up on lots of the clothes in my laundry. I have found a fairly easy way to get grass stains out of their jeans and clothing, without soaking the grass stained garments for hours.

So, there you go – my not-too-difficult way to get grass stains out of clothing.

Since my laundry stain repertoire seems to keep growing, stay tuned. I’m sure I’ll be adding to it soon.

How to Get Grease Stains (even set-in ones) Out of Clothing

A Ridiculously Simple Way to Get Silly Putty Out of Fabric

How to Get Dry Erase Marker Out of Clothing


Confessions of a Preacher’s Kid: #6 – Not Being Like “The World” Doesn’t Mean You Have to Hide From It

Confessions of a Preacher's Kid: Not Being "Like the World" Doesn't Mean You Have to Hide From It - While we don't want our kids to look and be like the world around them, but rather set apart for God, we also want them to be prepared to face the world and not just hide from it so that they can reach it with God's love.

In wrapping up my series of “Confessions of a Preacher’s Kid,” I’m looking ahead through the wisdom I’ve gained growing up in church and in a ministry family and thinking about how I want to apply those experiences in laying a solid foundation of faith for my children and encouraging their personal relationships with Jesus.

(If you’ve missed my first five confessions, you can catch up: Confession #1, Confession #2, Confession #3, Confession #4, & Confession #5.)

Of everything I’ve seen in the churches and Christianity, I think one of the hardest balances for a parent to find is guiding their children in being “in the world, but not of it.” In the wicked, evil time that we live, it’s easy to want to hide our children away from everything, but there will come a day when our children will have to face it all, and they will need to decide and know without a doubt in Whom THEY have believed.

Today’s Confession: Not Being Like “The World” Doesn’t Mean You Have to Hide From It

In Georgia, we lived on a beautiful little acre in the country that had all kinds of flowers and trees. Every spring, I could sit on the porch swing and enjoy the azaleas, jasmine, gardenias, and honeysuckle perfuming the air. However, my favorite flowers were the wild yellow roses that grew along the fence line of our driveway.

Year later, I remember using those roses as an example of what I wanted to be. In a conversation with my friend, I compared store-bought, cultivated roses, or “hothouse roses,” with wild roses. They are so different when you look at them. One is grown in a very protected environment, with temperature control, the right plant food, plenty of water, and very little adversity. Then you have a flower that just blooms out in the middle of everything – weather, pests, lawn mowers- and yet it blossoms despite it all.  While the cultivated rose may look beautiful and more perfect, it will NEVER match a wild rose for fragrance.

Our children can either be sheltered, bland hothouse roses that smell like basically every other flower in the shop, or they can be strong, thriving FRAGRANT wild roses who can truly impact the world around them.

Now don’t misunderstand my analogy. I’m not saying that we don’t watch out for our children or that we just throw them out into the world and hope they flourish.

What I see in a wild rose is a balance of being set apart while not being totally protected from the weeds, bugs, and storms.

I’ve seen two extremes in Christian parents’ views of raising their children. Some go entirely for “in the world,” allowing their children to be and look like “the world” and never guiding them in being “set apart.” They don’t make God and church a real priority for their family, they permit whatever music or movies or friends their kids want, and they don’t set a standard of holiness for their family. Then they wonder why their children don’t have a strong relationship with God and can’t stand against temptation. (I would say that this flower never blossoms or bears fruit.)

The other extreme are those who avoid everything not “Christian” and focus only on being “not of the world,” controlling everything their children are, or might be, or someday will be, exposed to that isn’t Godly. They obsess over media, don’t have any friends who are nonbelievers, and live by a lot of rules. They generally end up with children who either strongly rebel or kids who live in fear of or constant judgment of those “in the world.” (This would be your greenhouse-raised roses. They usually don’t flourish outside of their original environment.)

Growing up, I knew way more children who were in the second group, very sheltered, than I did those whose parents let them behave just like someone who wasn’t a Christian. I knew Christian kids who couldn’t watch more than a few hours a week of television or movies, kids who weren’t allowed to participate in any parties at school, kids who couldn’t watch Disney…ever, kids who couldn’t listen to any non-Christian music (not even oldies), kids who couldn’t go to the mall, even kids who couldn’t pick their own hairstyles until they were teens.

Should we monitor what our children watch, listen to, read, whom they play with, what they are doing online, and what they are learning in school?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes! Absolutely.

We don’t need to expose our little ones to things that aren’t age-appropriate or discuss topics with them that they aren’t mature enough to handle. We use wisdom.

We are accountable to God for what we allow into our children’s lives and for the example we set for them. We are definitely called to be different from the world and stand out. (1 Peter 2:9)

But some of those kids stood out for reasons that had nothing to do with Jesus. They tended to be socially awkward, a little immature, and they couldn’t even relate well to other kids in the church.

We can’t hide everything from our children for the first 18 years of their lives, and then expect them to be prepared to face a sinful, perverse, fallen world in a Godly way when they are on their own.

Confessions of a Preacher's Kid: Not Being "Like the World" Doesn't Mean You Have to Hide From It - While we don't want our kids to look and be like the world around them, but rather set apart for God, we also want them to be prepared to face the world and not just hide from it so that they can reach it with God's love.

Because someday, every child who has been “raised in church” or brought up in a Christian home will face what I call “the jumping off point.”

Someday your child will look at everything you’ve taught them, everything they’ve heard about God, every miracle they’ve witnessed, every prayer that they know has been answered, every rule they’ve been given, every verse they’ve ever read, and they will have to decide, on their own, for themselves, if it’s real. If THEY believe it. If THEY trust Him. If THEY are going to build the foundation of their life on Jesus.

It can happen even after they’ve already given Him their heart. Even after they’ve already said a prayer. Even after they’ve already been used to minister to their friends.

They may face doubts or questions, but that’s okay. God can handle it. He’s a big God. And He knows that they HAVE to make the jump from “what I’ve always been taught” to “what I BELIEVE with all that I am” if they are truly going to serve Him with their life.

The ones that I’ve seen have the hardest time navigating that jump are those who have either been allowed to be “too in the world” or hidden away to be “too not of it.”

Growing up, I watched TV and movies, and I played with neighbor kids who weren’t from Christian homes. We had rules, though. I remember we weren’t allowed to watch “The Simpsons,” but I didn’t really have a desire to. We watched “The Wizard of Oz” (I knew the difference between a fairy tale witch and real witchcraft) and Disney movies, even “The Little Mermaid” (When I was in 5th grade, I wasn’t looking for the bad stuff that was supposedly “hidden” in the movie. Ariel just had awesome underwater hair.)

I attended public school for most of my K-12 education (very thankful for the Christian school education I received from 6th-9th grade, though). I heard about evolution, but I knew what I believed because I’d been reading my Bible. In high school, I went through Sex Ed (ugh), but I’d already had conversations with my mom and the example of my parents’ Godly marriage to balance the “everybody is going to do it” assumption of the curriculum. I sat next to drug addicts and trouble makers in homeroom, but they came to me with prayer requests and genuine questions about God because I wasn’t hiding who I was or Him Whom I believed.

I remember asking God how I could relate to the people around me, since I hadn’t been through some of the rough things they had and I hadn’t done any of the “bad things” they had. How could I reach them?

And He reminded me of Someone else who had been among them but not like them, and He changed the entire world.

I didn’t have to become like them to relate to them.

And even though I was NOT like the world, I didn’t have to hide from it. I could reach it.

Confessions of a Preacher's Kid: Not Being "Like the World" Doesn't Mean You Have to Hide From It - While we don't want our kids to look and be like the world around them, but rather set apart for God, we also want them to be prepared to face the world and not just hide from it so that they can reach it with God's love.

That’s what I want for my children: To be fragrant wild roses that flourish, set apart, but attracting those around them with the essence of the God in Whom they believe.

John 17:14-18  “I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. I do not pray that You should take them out of the world, but that You should keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth. As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world.”

Let Me Be Singing: This Mother’s Anthem for Good & Bad Days

Life in Lape Haven: Let Me Be Singing: This Mother's Anthem for Good and Bad Days. As parents we have great days and rough days, but we never have to face them alone. We can rely on God's strength and find our joy in Him . This popular Christian worship song by Matt Redman has become my anthem and heart-cry, especially for those rough days. I want to be singing when the evening comes.

When I was in the thick of adjusting from being mommy of just one child to mommy of two children, there were some rough days. Not only was Josiah doing his newborn best to get us up as much as possible every night, but Elijah was showing his three-ness with a vengeance.

On those days, I struggled with holding onto the joy of being a mother, and it felt as though all that was left was the chaos. I would feel guilty and inadequate and overwhelmed. It wasn’t how I wanted to feel. I wanted to be able to find the good, like Pollyanna, and choose to be joyful, even when I was tired.

Around this time, I remember one Sunday when we were singing Matt Redman’s “10,000 Reasons (Bless the Lord),” and it was as though the song was written as my own personal anthem, especially the first verse.

“The sun comes up, it’s a new day dawning
It’s time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me
Let me be singing when the evening comes.”

Every morning I would rise with great intentions to have a better day than the one before, to face “whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me” with a determination to still “be singing when the evening comes.” I didn’t want to end every day defeated and beat down. But when your alarm clock is a baby crying or a toddler’s whining, you can feel drained before you even get out of bed.

But, lo and behold! The answer is in the chorus of the same song:

“Bless the Lord, O my soul, O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before, O my soul
I’ll worship Your holy name”

It was a reminder that, yes, we can choose to bless the Lord in everything. We can encourage ourselves in the Lord like David did (1 Samuel 30:6). We don’t have to let the frustrations overwhelm us. We can look to Him.

I think I get most overwhelmed and frustrated when I feel as though I have to do it all, and do it all myself. I’m the mom. When it’s just my boys and me at home, I’m the lone adult – I fix the food, I change the diapers, I soothe the crankies, I clean the messes, I enforce the rules. Sometimes those things are not easy or joyful.

Plus, I know that no matter how awesome of a super mom I am, I am not enough on my own. Moms, Dads – we’re not enough, despite what some cutesy, well-intentioned memes or inspirational quotes tell us. On my own, alone, I will never be enough for my children. I can’t be.

And yet, WITH God…well, all things are possible.

I don’t HAVE to do it all on my own or alone.

If the first verse is the cry of my heart, and the chorus is the reminder of “from whence cometh my help,” then the second verse is the reassurance that God has me (and my children) in His hands, and that’s a beautiful place to be.

“You’re rich in love, and You’re slow to anger
Your name is great, and Your heart is kind
For all Your goodness I will keep on singing
Ten thousand reasons for my heart to find”

Since God has given me my children, He has equipped me to parent them, and when I rely on Him, then His joy can be my strength on the good days and the rough ones. He loves us all richly, and He is patient and kind. He’s forgiving when I make mistakes in parenting my boys, and He’s there to guide me and help me do it right. He gives me wisdom when I have no idea what I’m doing, and He helps me see the humor in so many of their innocent, but disastrous messes.

It’s not just looking for the good, but looking to His goodness, that will have me still “singing when the evening comes.”


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Feature image courtesy of Pixabay/Pexels.