Life in Lape Haven

Tag - parenting

How We Changed Our Family Atmosphere with One Question

February 23, 2018
8 Comments
How We Changed Our Family Atmosphere With One Question - Life in Lape Haven. The worst part of our special family evening became the best, most memorable part with just one simple question that changed the atmosphere in our family.

This year for Valentine’s Day, my husband and I had originally planned to do something together during the day since he was off. However, since our regular babysitters were booked (meaning both sets of grandparents were not available), we decided instead to do something as a family once Elijah was out of school.

From the moment we picked him up, our oldest had a bad attitude. He was all for going out to eat, but he did NOT want to go anywhere else (like, say, Hobby Lobby, which was going to be a treat for Mommy).

And the complaining started.

After being rather excited to surprise him with a special afternoon, I was frustrated and irritated with his lack of gratitude.

So, I tried explaining to him that Mommy and Daddy were trying to do something nice as a family, that we wanted to have a fun night all together, and that by complaining and whining about what we might do, he was not exactly showing his appreciation.

I reminded Elijah of the sweet way he had started my Valentine’s Day by creating a cute scavenger hunt for me through the downstairs, leading to some “flowers” he had made. I asked him how he would have felt had I not wanted to follow his clues or just took them down.

To his credit, Elijah realized how he was making us feel, and he apologized.

I thought everything was going to be good after that.

But then…he started pestering Josiah, who rarely backs down from a fight. And suddenly they were arguing and being nasty to each other, and I just wanted to turn around and go home.

So much for a special Valentine’s Day together as a family.

How We Changed Our Family Atmosphere With One Question - Life in Lape Haven. The worst part of our special family evening became the best, most memorable part with just one simple question that changed the atmosphere in our family.

My husband, however, pulled out a question for the boys that had an immediate effect on the entire atmosphere in the car, giving hope to this discouraged Mommy.

He got them quieted long enough to ask Elijah, “What is something you love about Josiah?”

Of course, being a big brother, Elijah was tempted to take the teasing route, but Daddy headed him off, and answered the question himself.

Brad gave examples of why he loved not only Josiah, but Elijah, Isaiah, and Mommy, too.

“I love Josiah because he can be very sweet. I love Elijah because he is creative. I love Isaiah because he likes to cuddle. I love Mommy because she’s intelligent.”

Then I added my “what I loves” to the conversation.

“I love Elijah because he is curious. I love Josiah because he is compassionate. I love Isaiah because he has a funny sense of humor. I love Daddy because he works hard to take care of us.”

Josiah eagerly jumped in to share his.

“I love Elijah because he is nice. (Josiah is forgiving and quick to forget…Haha) I love Isaiah because he is cute. I love Mommy because she helps me. I love Daddy because he plays games with me.”

Finally Elijah was ready to prove that he could come up with his own answers to the question as well.

“I love Josiah because he is good at SurvivalCraft (a video game they play). I love Daddy because he’s silly. I love Isaiah because he’s fun. I love Mommy because she cooks good food.”

 ABCmouse.com

And suddenly, the boys weren’t fighting, but rather happily telling each other and us all the different things they could think of that they loved about everyone. We didn’t just stop after we each took a turn, but let them continue as long as they would.

It was part game – the challenge to see what new reason they could come up with – and part fun curiosity – they were delighted to hear what everyone else loved about them.

How We Changed Our Family Atmosphere With One Question - Life in Lape Haven. The worst part of our special family evening became the best, most memorable part with just one simple question that changed the atmosphere in our family.

My Valentine “flowers” from Elijah. His thoughtfulness is just another reason I love him!

In the busyness of every day family life, it can be easy to forget to speak out those things to our children and spouse. We’re quick to correct faults and criticize, especially when things get stressful or overwhelming.

However, taking the time to not just say, “I love you,” but to list the wonderful qualities and traits in our loved ones, is edifying both to them and us. I definitely felt more loved and appreciated when my boys spoke specific things that they cherished in their mommy. Then as I thought about what I wanted to say about my husband and for each of my boys, I was reminded anew of what precious, unique, and wonderful little people our children are and how blessed I am with my husband.

Did our boys fight again that night? Of course. They’re kids. However, it wasn’t in the same nasty tones as before.

We were able to spend our evening together knowing that each person in our family was loved very much by everyone else. Of all the special things we did together for our Valentine’s night that was the most special part of all.

 

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Why We Love Baby Sign Language & 6 Tips for Teaching It to Your Little One

January 27, 2018
4 Comments
Why We Love Baby Sign Language & 6 Tips for Teaching It to Your Little One - Life in Lape Haven. Baby sign language is an easy, fun, and helpful way to teach your baby to communicate before they can even talk. All three of our children have learned signs and used them before they were one year old. Here's how you can teach your child signing, too.

When I was pregnant with Elijah, my paternal grandmother gave me two books about how to teach your baby to communicate using sign language. (One even came with flash cards.)

I’ll be honest. At first, I just looked at her. I’d never heard of such a thing.

But Grandma Charlotte was a pretty smart, well-read lady. She’d also taken classes in sign language a few years earlier so that she could communicate with a couple of family members who were hearing impaired, including my cousin’s little girl who is deaf. She knew how easily children could pick it up and how helpful it would be.Why We Love Baby Sign Language & 6 Tips for Teaching It to Your Little One - Life in Lape Haven. Baby sign language is an easy, fun, and helpful way to teach your baby to communicate before they can even talk. All three of our children have learned signs and used them before they were one year old. Here's how you can teach your child signing, too.

So, I read the books, learned some of the basic signs, and taught them to my husband and our parents.

When Elijah was a few months old, I started using the signs as we went through the day, whenever it applied to what we were doing. I’d say the word as I signed it, and soon it became a habit for me.

As Elijah got a little older, we could tell he understood what the signs meant, and, somewhere around 8-9 months, I think, he began signing back.

If you’ve never seen a baby use sign language, it’s kind of amazing – and super cute!

Suddenly, he could ask for a “drink” or let us know when he was “done” or wanted “more.”

We didn’t have to struggle as much with figuring out what he wanted or needed, and Elijah wasn’t whiny or frustrated…unless he was told that he couldn’t have something he wanted. 🙂 Learning “no” is never fun, whether it’s verbal or in sign.

As my family saw how easily Elijah used his signs and how helpful it was, they started using them with his younger cousins.

My grandma was especially proud of our success, and of course, she enjoyed signing to him and seeing him respond happily.

Why We Love Baby Sign Language & 6 Tips for Teaching It to Your Little One - Life in Lape Haven. Baby sign language is an easy, fun, and helpful way to teach your baby to communicate before they can even talk. All three of our children have learned signs and used them before they were one year old. Here's how you can teach your child signing, too.

When Josiah came along, there was no question that we would teach him those basic signs as well, this time with Elijah’s help. Sadly, my Grandma Charlotte passed away when Josiah was only 5 months old, so she never really got to see how he benefitted from the communication tool that was her idea.

Now four years later, here we are, teaching a third little boy to use his hands to talk to Mommy, Daddy, and the rest of his family.

Isaiah’s response to sign language was almost immediate because the first one he learned was “milk.” If I wasn’t completely ready to nurse him, but showed him the sign for it, he would get upset pretty quickly! And there were times when I’m pretty sure he signed “milk,” even though he seemed too young to be able to.

Now that he’s at the age where he can mimic our signs easily, it’s been so fun to watch his understanding blossom. He’s been very quick to let us know when he’s “all done” eating, and he loves to tell you when something is “hot,” like the heater or his toy stove with the light-up burner. Haha.

But he picked up a new sign even more quickly last week. After only a couple of demonstrations and connecting the sign with what it meant, he was ready to use “cookie” as often as possible. 🙂

When others see us using signs with our boys, I’ve had them ask me if signing discouraged my children from talking when they were little. Since they could get their message across pretty clearly with just some gestures, after all, why would they need to use words?

Our experience, though, has been that both of our older boys started talking fairly early and easily. While this may be in part because I talked to them ALL THE TIME and prompted them to use words once they were able to, I think that teaching them sign language actually encouraged them to try different kinds of communication because they knew we were paying attention to what they “said.”

Another benefit I’ve found it being able to tell my little ones something without having to say a word, which is especially nice in church when you’re trying to be quiet, or in a noisy place, where your kids might have trouble hearing you. (Being able to sign “no” to even an older child across the room is awesome, especially when you couple it with “the look.”)

If you’d like to begin teaching your child sign language, here are a few tips from our signing experience with our three boys.

Why We Love Baby Sign Language & 6 Tips for Teaching It to Your Little One - Life in Lape Haven. Baby sign language is an easy, fun, and helpful way to teach your baby to communicate before they can even talk. All three of our children have learned signs and used them before they were one year old. Here's how you can teach your child signing, too.

6 Tips For Teaching Baby Sign to Your Little One:
1. Start Early

Begin signing even before your baby can physically and developmentally copy them, maybe around 3-4 months old.  You’ll get into the habit, & they’ll be learning. (Even if your child is older, you can introduce signing at any age!)

 

2. Don’t Use Too Many

Pick a few basic signs that you’ll use most often and most effectively and start there. We did ones like Milk, Eat, More, Done, Bath, and Change. You can add others later (Mom, Dad, Please, Thank You, Potty, Dog, Cat, and tons more), just like you build your baby’s verbal vocabulary a little at a time. Here are 21 words you can sign easily.

 

3. Be Consistent

Use the same sign and word each time and teach your spouse and other family or caretakers to use them, too. (Using standard ASL signs is the best for consistency with others who sign.) We all learn better with repetition. (Our kids can even use their signs in the nursery at church. Several families have taught their children signs, so most of the regular nursery volunteers are pretty fluent in baby sign as well. How cool is that?)

 

4. Sign in Context

Use the sign when you’re doing the action. Signing “change” makes more sense when you’ve got your little one down and ready to change their diaper, rather than when you’re in the living room and think they might have a dirty diaper. 🙂

 

5. Don’t Expect Perfection

When your baby starts to sign back, it’s most likely not going to be perfectly executed. Keep in mind your little one is still developing those fine motor skills, so pay attention to anything that even closely resembles a specific sign and respond to it.

 

6. Keep Signing

Once your child starts talking, there’s no rule that says you have to stop using and teaching them signs. Not only is knowing another language fun and beneficial for challenging their minds (and ours), it will create an instant connection for them with anyone they know/meet who also signs, some who may use sign language as their main form of communication.

 

Need more help getting started? Here are some fun resources for learning and teaching Baby Sign Language.

(Some of these links are affiliate links, which means that I may receive a small commission if you use the links. You can see my full disclosure for details.)

VIDEOS

One of our favorite sign instructors is Rachel Coleman of Two Little Hands and Signing Time. (We even used her “Potty Time” app when we were potty training Josiah.) Here are just a few of the video available on YouTube.

Baby Signs:

 

The Potty Time Song:

 

Best of Two Little Hands TV, featuring signs for foods, clothing, ABCs, colors, and more:


BOOKS


 

HAVE YOU TAUGHT YOUR CHILD BABY SIGN LANGUAGE? WHAT OTHER TIPS WOULD YOU GIVE?

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10 Ways to Help Your Kids Make Christmas More About Others

November 24, 2017
11 Comments
10 Ways to Help Your Children Make Christmas More About Others (& Less About Themselves) - Life in Lape Haven. It's easy for kids to only think of their wishlists at Christmastime. But the best joy of the season isn't found in getting. Guide your children to the best joy of the season by making it more about giving to others.

Once upon a time, I lived in a beautiful world where our first child, Elijah, was oblivious to the idea of making a Christmas wish list for himself or seeing the holiday as a time to get whatever he asked for. We just spent the holiday talking about the birth of Jesus, looking at lights, baking cookies, hanging out with family, and more.

We could watch TV, even children’s programming with all of its targeted advertising, without our little guy shouting out after every commercial, “I want that!”

Since we didn’t play up Santa much, he kind of freaked out people in the store when he stared at them blankly instead of eagerly answering their question of “What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?” (It was kind of funny to watch, actually.)

As he got older, however, those outside influences and his own experiences (he knew that Mommy and Daddy, his grandparents, and other family were going to buy him presents) started to turn his first thoughts of Christmastime to “What am I going to get?”

And of course, Josiah picked up on the game even earlier, with the help of his older brother.

Now there is nothing wrong with looking forward to presents. Children, like all of us, enjoy receiving presents and get excited about that aspect of Christmas very easily. That’s not really bad – it’s human nature. Receiving presents is awesome. So, no, I’m not anti-gifts, especially for my children.

However, I don’t want my boys’ main concerns at Christmas to be focused on themselves and what they hope to get on Christmas morning.

Not because I’m stuffy and mean or a grinchy Scrooge.

Not because of “kids these days…”

But because I love them and want the very best for them.

And the very best joy at Christmas isn’t found in the getting.

If we want our children to truly enjoy Christmas to the fullest, then we have to let them experience the absolute best part – the giving.

10 Ways to Help Your Children Make Christmas More About Others (& Less About Themselves) - Life in Lape Haven. It's easy for kids to only think of their wishlists at Christmastime. But the best joy of the season isn't found in getting. Guide your children to the best joy of the season by making it more about giving to others.

So, here are some things we’ve done over the years to try to keep the “I Wants” and holiday entitlement at bay while allowing our boys to revel in the real fun of Christmas by making the season about celebrating Jesus and giving to others.

 

1. WRITE A “WISH TO GIVE” LIST

Even though Elijah can now write his own Christmas wish list, I still like to have our boys help us make the Gift-Giving list for their cousins, grandparents, and teachers. Challenging them to come up with good, thoughtful gifts that they know would make that person happy for Christmas requires the boys to think about that person’s likes, interests, or needs – not their own.

 

2. SHOP FOR OTHERS

Something else we’ve always done is let the boys go shopping with us. They may not help pick out all the gifts because shopping with kids at Christmas is insane…and they aren’t the best at keeping secrets yet. But we do want them to be a part of at least some of it, even if it’s choosing the wrapping paper.

They also get to pick out presents for Mommy, Daddy, and each other. With a set budget per person, my husband and I either take turns with them in the stores, or better still – send them with their grandparents, so they can find just the right gifts. We try to let them come up with the idea, and while sometimes they need a little direction (No, Mommy doesn’t really want a Barbie), we let them make the final decision about the gift they want to give. They also get to wrap it themselves (with help as needed).

 

3. MAKE PRESENTS

While buying an awesome gift is good, taking the time to make one makes it even more special. Each year I help the boys create something for their grandparents, whether it’s an ornament, an oven mitt, or a picture frame. The goal is to find something useful that the grandparents will actually want that our kids can actually make (Haha). When they invest more of themselves into a gift, it means more for them when they give that gift away.

Here are some ideas of gifts we’ve made for the grandparents for past Christmases.

10 Ways to Help Your Children Make Christmas More About Others (& Less About Themselves) - Life in Lape Haven. It's easy for kids to only think of their wishlists at Christmastime. But the best joy of the season isn't found in getting. Guide your children to the best joy of the season by making it more about giving to others.

 

4. PACK A SHOEBOX/SPONSOR A FAMILY/GIVE A GOAT

When Elijah was younger, the church we attended participated in the annual Samaritan’s Purse Operation Christmas Child, where you pack a shoebox-sized box with small items that a child would like or need, based on the age range and gender you chose. Those boxes are then sent all over the world to minister to children who most likely have never received a Christmas present before. Not only do they enjoy a big party and get to open a gift, they also learn about Jesus.

We always had Elijah help us select and pack the gifts in our shoeboxes.

If it’s too late to take part in the Shoebox collection this year, you can also check out other options on the Samaritan’s Purse site for helping families around the world. You can give a goat (yes, seriously), provide clean water, help provide medical care for a pregnant mother, or meet one of the other needs listed. Not only does this help a family overseas, but you can also use it to start conversations with your child about how blessed we really are in our nation, the difference between wants and needs, and how the whole world needs Jesus.

Our current church home doesn’t do the shoeboxes, but they still offer a variety of ways for us to bless other children and families at Christmas time, such providing food for Christmas day meals or blessing a local child with a Christmas gift. (Each year they host a Christmas party for children who are part of Ohio’s Kinship Care, a relative foster care placement program, and we get to help provide the gifts for the kids. Of course, we recruit our boys’ help when we shop for those gifts, too.)

If you don’t have an official outreach from your church or a local organization, you could make Christmas brighter for a child by giving to Toys for Tots, the Salvation Army’s Angel Tree Program, or any number of charities, or just choose a family you know that might need some extra cheer and bless them.

 

5. PLAN FOR SIMPLE RANDOM ACTS OF KINDNESS

Every year we go with my husband’s family to one of the many downtown Christmas celebrations held around the area. When Elijah was about 2, I brought along a pack of candy canes for him to give out to the different shop cashiers, street performers, and random strangers we met throughout the evening. I knew he would be getting all kinds of treats and special goodies, and I wanted him to have a way to give to others, even if it was something small.

Giving out candy canes, either during that family outing or another, has become one of the things we do during the holiday season. The boys enjoy surprising people with the treat, a smile, and a “Merry Christmas!”

And after the success of our mission to bless random people during our family vacation this summer, I can see us using those clips on the car visor for extra special acts of kindness this Christmas.

What I’ve learned from the candy canes and our summer’s random acts of kindness is that my kids LOVE to look for creative ways to make someone else’s day. It gets them looking for opportunities and thinking much more about others.

 

6. MAKE COOKIES TO GIVE

Similar to the homemade gifts our boys make for their grandparents, having them help make cookies to give away means that those cookies are extra special.

We like to put together a cookie plate for our elderly neighbor every year, and the boys go with us to deliver it and wish him a merry Christmas.

You can also put together cookie trays for your local fire and police departments or for co-workers or church staff.

More #christmascookie fun. #Yummy

A post shared by Kishona Lape (@lifeinlapehaven) on

 

7. A FOUR-GIFT CHRISTMAS

A couple of years ago, we decided to try a new approach to our family’s gift-giving, reining in excess, entitlement, and holiday stress by following the four-gift rule. This meant that our list for each boy would only include four presents: something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read.

This approach has been hugely successful for us. Our boys are just as excited about Christmas morning as kids who expect piles and piles of presents.

But by limiting the number of gifts, it helps make the season less about what they want to get. Plus, as a family we can continue to focus on creative ways to celebrate Jesus and bless others.

 

8. READ THE CHRISTMAS STORY…OFTEN

If we really want our children to focus on the true meaning of Christmas, they need to know what it is and why we are celebrating to begin with.

In our house, we have a special way of telling about the birth of Jesus. One of our boys’ (and mine) favorite decorations is my Fontanini nativity set. Since the pieces are not easily breakable (we’ve not lost one yet), I let the boys play with them to re-enact the story of Christmas. In December, nearly every night before bed, they will ask for us to read Luke 2 or Matthew 2 to them as they move each character around with the telling.

You might not have a child-friendly nativity set to play with, but that’s okay. Simply read about it from the Bible and talk with your children about what it all means. Or find a good children’s book about baby Jesus. Or a movie. Even the Christmas music that surrounds us all season should give you an opportunity to remember Whom we are really celebrating.

 

9. BE INTENTIONAL WHEN IT’S TIME TO OPEN PRESENTS

We’ve all seen the Christmas shows and movies where the kids race down the stairs on Christmas morning, head straight for the tree, and gleefully start tearing into the packages, as the parents stand back and watch the unfolding chaos.

While I LOVE the enthusiasm and joy that children bring to Christmas, this free-for-all approach doesn’t send the message that we want our boys to get.

From the time that they were young, our children have learned that we wait until everyone’s gathered together (and the camera is ready – obviously!). Then we take turns opening one present at a time.

Slowing down the process allows them to actually appreciate what they receive and gives them a chance to express that appreciation to the giver.

It also allows them to witness someone else’s delight at opening a gift, making the presents about shared joy and not just their own.  

 

10. MODEL THE ATTITUDE

You knew this one was coming, right? If you have children of any age, you know by now that they are better at emulating what they’ve seen than what they’ve been told.

Lead the way, and set the example.

Have patience in crazy traffic. Be considerate of even the crazy shoppers in the stores. Express your thanks for kind gestures and gifts. Find ways to cheerfully bless others.

 

These are just some of the things that we’ve been doing as a family to try to make our holidays more about others.

Are our children perfect, selfless, altruistic little angels? Not at all.

But they are learning to think of others at least a little bit more and with a genuine heart to help and give.

And slowly, but surely they are realizing an important eternal truth – that it truly is more blessed to give than to receive. 🙂

 

There are many more ways to help your children experience the full joy of the season through thinking of others.
WHAT WOULD YOU ADD?

 

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How to Find Your Quiet Moments When Life Is LOUD

November 10, 2017
10 Comments
How to Find Your Quiet Moments When Life Is LOUD - Life in Lape Haven. As moms, we all have days when the demands are constant, the noise is incessant, and all we need is a quiet moment to focus. Where are they hidden throughout your day?

I’m sitting here on the couch, enjoying one of those very rare moments when my house is quiet in the middle of the day. Sure there is the white noise of the baby monitor close by, the whir of the washer in the other room, the click of my keyboard keys as I type, and the hum as the furnace decides it’s ready to chase away a bit of the fall chill in the house. But other than that – it’s still and quiet.

Our little guy is upstairs napping, our oldest son is at school, and my husband took our middlest to the store with him.

It’s just me and silence.

This is that golden silence that every mother needs on occasion. The calm hush we long for when our kids are bickering, the baby is squalling, the dog is barking, and the oven timer is going off to remind us to hurry along before we burn dinner.

It’s that elusive peace that we are willing to stay up *just* a bit longer for after the kids are put to bed, even when we’re dead-on-our-feet exhausted.

It’s what we need to catch our breath and refresh our souls, and then even when we manage to find it, it’s fleeting.

Like now. Little man is waking up from a shorter-than-he-and-I needed nap.

How to Find Your Quiet Moments When Life Is LOUD

SEVEN HOURS LATER…
So, that was a nice 15 minutes of quiet earlier today. 🙂

(This post contains affiliate links which mean at no additional cost to you, I may receive a small commission when you use the links. You can see my disclosure statement for more.)

I know you understand those days, moms (and dads). And I know we all also have those days where even 15 minutes of quiet is nowhere to be found.

A lot of my days feel like THAT: days where the demands are constant, the noise incessant (even just when the kids are nicely playing, it can be…energetic), and I feel unfocused, scattered, or overwhelmed. Those loud days can be difficult parenting days.

It’s hard to “mom” well when you can’t even hear yourself think.

However, lately God has shown me that there ARE moments throughout my day that, while not perfectly calm and still, are moments where I could enjoy a pause or get mentally organized or just talk to Him.

But every time I get a moment to myself, whether I’m doing dishes while the boys play upstairs, folding clothes after bedtime, driving home with two boys asleep in the car, or even when I’m getting my makeup on or taking a shower – I’ve been filling up those moments with distractions.

And it’s not always Facebook. 🙂

In fact, usually I’m trying to be overly-productive.

I can listen to a podcast or watch a webinar while I’m making dinner or just cleaning up the kitchen.

Having the Kindle app on my phone means that I can read a book while brushing my teeth or drying my hair.

Amazon.com – Read eBooks using the FREE Kindle Reading App on Most Devices

Or maybe I’m listening to music as I sort clothes in the laundry room.

And of course, when my boys are otherwise occupied, finally getting to watch something on TV besides Paw Patrol, Wild Kratts, or Tumble Leaf (an Amazon series) is kind of appealing for my clothes-folding or dusting in the living room.

But my multitasking has also been over-tasking my focus and leaving me feeling disconnected from myself and from God.

By filling up all my possible quiet moments, I have been taking away my chance to pause and ponder – like finding the root of recent disciplinary issues with my boys, thinking through blog post ideas that I wanted to write, planning ahead for upcoming family events, or most importantly, praying or meditating on God’s Word and giving Him space to whisper direction, correction, or vision to my heart. (Nothing will renew your strength for the day better than finding time in God’s presence – even if it’s only a few seconds.)

So, I’ve started appreciating those short blips of calm that I find in my days and using them more wisely – by just letting them be truly quiet moments (or maybe “quiet-ish” moments – as quiet as they can be with life still going on around me.)

I turn off the noise that I can, leave my phone alone, and I think, pray, and listen.

Once again, I feel focused, capable, and in control. I’m better able to handle the ever-present “busy” of my kids and the many demands of being a mom, wife, and homemaker.

I’m not saying that when you have a spare moment of your own that you can’t watch TV, listen to music, catch up on your favorite blogger’s posts 😉 or read a book. We need that time, too.

(In fact, we love our Amazon Prime membership because of all the shows, movies, music, and e-books we get in addition to our free 2-day shipping 🙂  – Join Amazon Prime – Watch Thousands of Movies & TV Shows Anytime – Start Free Trial Now)

However, if you are filling EVERY spare moment with your own distractions, you will eventually feel the loss of the peace and preparedness that comes in the quiet.

So, if like me, you’ve felt out of sorts and need to recharge or refocus, look for those little moments where, instead of filling them up, you can pause to appreciate the quiet and let God refill you.

WHERE DO YOU FIND YOUR QUIET MOMENTS DURING THE DAY?

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Tried It Tuesday: How to Dye Dry Pasta

September 12, 2017
4 Comments
Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Dye Dry Pasta. Colored pasta noodles are great for kids' crafts, art projects, and sensory bins. Here is how I dyed dry pasta using food coloring for our vacation Bible school Maker Fun Factory and the tips I learned through the experience.

This year our church’s Vacation Bible School was one of my favorite themes ever.

“Maker Fun Factory” was a very hands-on curriculum all about how we’ve been “created by God and built for a purpose.” Throughout the week, the kids were encouraged to be creative and inventive as they learned Bible points and stories focused on knowing God has a plan for each of us. 

As a member of the VBS Preschool Team, I helped in the planning and preparations, and in the process I got to try out something I’ve wanted to do with my boys for a while: DYING DRY PASTA.

(And I got to try it out thoroughly as I dyed 6 boxes worth of pasta! :))

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Dye Dry Pasta. Colored pasta noodles are great for kids' crafts, art projects, and sensory bins. Here is how I dyed dry pasta using food coloring and the tips I learned through the experience.

This dyed pasta was used for crafts, such as bracelets and picture frames and robot decorations, but you can also use the pasta for fun sensory bins or boxes, too. And while we only needed wheel-shapes that mimicked gears for our Maker Fun Factory theme, you can dye any size or shape of pasta that you want, all with this same simple technique.

Having never dyed pasta before I volunteered to do it, I had to get my Pinterest research on, and then make sure that I didn’t mess it up.

What I found was that there are lots of pins about dying pasta, but not many of them give you very specific details on how to do it. So, as I was undertaking this task, I made sure to get the details for you. (You’re welcome.)

HOW TO DYE DRY PASTA
What You Need:

Life in Lape Haven: Tried It Tuesday - How to Dye Dry Pasta. Colored pasta noodles are great for kids' crafts, art projects, and sensory bins. Here is how I dyed dry pasta using food coloring for our vacation Bible school Maker Fun Factory and the tips I learned through the experience.

Pasta – As I mentioned, you can use any type, size, or shape of pasta. Larger pasta noodles might require a little more liquid & coloring, though.

Food Coloring – For ours, I did 9 (yes, 9) different colors. We had a rainbow of options. I used your standard food colorings of red, yellow, blue, and green, in addition to the neon options of bright pink, purple, teal, and neon green. Then I also combined red & yellow for a fun orange.

Distilled Vinegar – You can also use Rubbing Alcohol, but since little kids like to put things in their mouths, I went with vinegar.

Plastic zip-top bags – Since I was going to be making so many batches of pasta, I designated a bag for each color. If you are only doing a few, you could try to use one bag for similar colors (For example, do yellow, then orange).

Baking sheets or trays – You’ll need to let the pasta dry after you dye it, so make sure you have enough trays ready to spread out the pasta.

Parchment paper or wax paper (optional) – You can line your baking sheets with parchment or wax paper. This just helps with clean up and transferring the dried, dyed pasta into storage bags.

 

What You Do:

1.  Mix Up Your Coloring.

Put 2 Tbsp. of Vinegar into you zip-top bag. *TIP: I used our napkin holder to support the bag so it was easier to add each item.

Add in at least 10 drops of your color. I found that for a brighter color, especially with the darker shades, I used up to 30-40 drops. (If I used 30 drops or more of color, I also used an additional tablespoon of vinegar to help get the pasta covered well.)

2. Add Your Pasta

I used 2 cups of pasta for each color. Pour that in on top of your coloring in the bag.

3. Mix It All Together

Seal up the bag, making sure to get most of the air out of it. Then shake, squish (lightly), and massage pasta in the bag to thoroughly coat it in the color. This can take a little while, especially if your pasta has some nooks and crannies. This is a great job to allow your little helpers to do.

4. Let It Set

Lay out the bag of pasta as flat as possible, and let it set for about 10 minutes or so. Be careful of letting it set TOO LONG – pasta sitting in liquid will start to get gummy and soft after a while. Flip it over a time or two during that time so that the liquid isn’t just on one part of the pasta.

5. Dry It Out

Carefully pour your pasta out onto the parchment –lined baking sheet(s), spreading it out into one layer. This part can take some time, as you want to avoid having the pasta pieces touching. Then set the baking sheets up and out of the way or outside to dry. Depending on how warm or humid the day is, your pasta should dry within 20-30 minutes. Give the trays a little shake every so often to help keep the pasta from sticking to the paper. *CAUTION: Beware of curious pets eating your pasta if you have it where they can get to it…such as outside on the ground. I speak from experience and from having lost half of my blue and pink pasta batches to a curious Labradoodle.

6. Store It /Use It

Once it is COMPLETELY dry, you can transfer the pasta to a zip-top bag or a lidded container until you are ready to use it. Store it somewhere cool and dry. (One of the ladies at church stored some in her car for a few hours…in the middle of summer…and it got really soft and squishy.)

Need ideas for what to do with your pretty dyed pasta? Honestly, your kids will probably come up with some amazing ideas on their own, but if you need a place to start, here are some fun pasta projects:

WHAT WILL YOU MAKE WITH YOUR DYED PASTA?


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A Simple Change That May Keep You Safer in a Parking Lot

August 24, 2017
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Life in Lape Haven: The Simple Change That May Keep You Safer in a Parking Lot. The end of a rough grocery shopping day with my boys ended up with a bit of a scare when I was caught off-guard in the parking lot. That's when I realized that a simple choice earlier made the incident even more dangerous for me and my children.

The incident happened quickly, and even though I’ve read all the tips, I was caught off-guard. Thankfully nothing bad happened to any of us, but those split seconds and that moment stayed with me. I realized that one different choice earlier that morning might have left my children and me less vulnerable, and I resolved to change my habits for the future. Months later, I was glad I did.

It had been one of those rough days.

My boys were tired after a morning of grocery shopping, and 4-year-old Josiah was in an especially nasty mood since he didn’t like his temporary seat in the last row of our SUV. We were still praying and looking for a new vehicle that would fit all three car seats better. But as it was, he was relegated to the far back, and he hated it.

So the entire time I loaded the car, he was throwing an epic fit. It continued, gaining intensity and volume while I stood half-in and half-out of the SUV, trying to cinch his straps, leaning over the middle seats and Isaiah’s car seat to do so.

Isaiah had been easier since he was barely 3-months-old and still staying in his infant carrier. All I had to do was click it in. Thankfully.

In the midst of threatening Josiah with punishment if he didn’t settle down, I heard,

“Excuse me, ma’am.”

Whirling around, I saw him.

The man was only a few feet away, standing near the back of our vehicle.

And I was immediately on alert (and praying).

Where had he come from? What did he want? Was he dangerous? Why was he bothering me when CLEARLY I was busy (Josiah was still crying in the background)?

In a split second, my mind was assessing everything from where my keys were (in my hand) to his size and build (my height or shorter, slim) to noticing if anyone else was nearby (not that I could see).

And that’s when I realized how I had made this situation even more dangerous for myself.

(Besides being completely distracted from my surroundings by my squalling child)

It was in how I had parked in the parking lot.

Even though I had a parking space fairly close to the store, I had parked so that my driver’s side, the side where I would be putting my kids into their seats, and therefore spending the most time, was facing AWAY from the store entrance.

No one could see me from the store.

My big, tall SUV with darkened windows was between me and my most likely source of help in a bad situation.  It was something I’d never thought of before.

When I didn’t say anything, the man continued talking, “I’m sorry. I hate to bother you, but my girlfriend and I are trying to get to Canal (a town about 30-40 minutes away), and our gas light is on.”

I mentally wondered where the girlfriend and car were. (While the small town we were in is relatively safe, it has a tragically big issue with drugs. Having served Grand Jury duty in the county a few years ago, I learned just how huge the problem is.)

So, yes, I was suspicious. Plus I had two little ones to consider, not just myself. I wasn’t leaving them to go verify a story, and I wasn’t inviting this man any closer for our own safety. (Had Brad been with me, we might have offered to have the guy follow us to a gas station, but by myself, I just didn’t feel that was the wisest choice. Of course, had God prompted me to do something, I would have.)

“Sorry, I don’t have any cash on me,” I replied honestly.

The man started to back away, “Alright, well, thanks, anyway.”

Watching him as he walked away, I was entirely aware of where he was headed as I closed the side door, climbed into the driver’s seat, and locked the door.

He ended up a few aisles over, talking to a couple coming out of the store. I watched as he walked around the parking lot, stopping when he found a person to talk to. I never saw him go to “his” car, even though that particular parking lot isn’t that big.

And I sat there, thanking God for His protection.

I decided to change my parking habits from that day on.

Life in Lape Haven: The Simple Change That May Keep You Safer in a Parking Lot. The end of a rough grocery shopping day with my boys ended up with a bit of a scare when I was caught off-guard in the parking lot. That's when I realized that a simple choice earlier made the incident even more dangerous for me and my children.

FAST FORWARD 5 MONTHS…

Last week, I had all three of my boys with me for a quick stop into the store, and as I pulled into the parking lot, I specifically thought about my encounter with the guy there. In fact, it was a rather STRONG nudging, the kind that come from God.

And I parked differently because of it.

I made sure that my side of our new-to-us minivan was facing the storefront. With Isaiah all but walking now, he rides in the cart, and we have the challenge of strapping his wiggly, grabbing-onto-everything-self back into his seat (behind the driver’s seat) when we’re leaving. It takes a lot longer than it used to.

Life in Lape Haven: The Simple Change That May Keep You Safer in a Parking Lot. The end of a rough grocery shopping day with my boys ended up with a bit of a scare when I was caught off-guard in the parking lot. That's when I realized that a simple choice earlier made the incident even more dangerous for me and my children.

While no one was having a tantrum as we got back into the car to  go, it was still a very déjà vu feeling when I was tightening up Isaiah’s straps, and I heard,

“Excuse me, ma’am.”

It was the same guy. Standing the same distance away. And he told me the EXACT same story (which even my 7-year-old, who wasn’t with us before, remembered me sharing about. It lent some credence to my prior suspicions that this guy probably wasn’t really looking for gas money, sadly.)

Only this time, I felt safer because I knew that he hadn’t been a real threat last time and also because I could clearly see people going in and coming out of the store – and they could see me.

All I could think of was, “I’m so glad that I listened to God’s reminder about our previous meeting with this man and parked differently.”

After sending him on his way yet again, I got back in my van, feeling much more in control than I had the last time I’d met that man.

I know that the simple change of how I parked (and having felt God’s reminder to do so) is what made the difference.

Now I know that we don’t want to live in fear or distrust of people around us, but the truth is that we live in a fallen world. Not everyone CAN be trusted, unfortunately, and we need to be wise in every situation, for us and our children.

As moms, it’s especially easy for us to be distracted or have our hands full at pretty much any given moment, but perhaps implementing this little tip will give you a little more security in at least one part of your hectic day.

For more tips on being safe in parking lots and public garages, check out these sites: Parking Lot Safety and Staying Safe in Parking Lots.

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